A Piffle Princess Story

2012-01-28T07:45:00.000+08:00

~ IMMORAL MEMORY ~

This is 背徳の記憶〜The Lost Memory〜. This is originally by vocaloids Kamui Gakupo, KAITO and Kagamine Len, but this video is actually a cover by RAI, Razzy and Yoru Sagara, who are individually quite popular in youtube, and I guess also in niconico. It's been a while since I've stumbled upon this video, but every time I listen to this, I just get blown away by the intensity and power of their voices. It's a really awesome cover, and IMO, even better than the original. And what's so amazing is that these guys are not even Japanese! Rai is Malaysian, Razzy is from the US and Yoru Sagara is just from the city next to mine! Yes, he's Filipino, and I would know cos he sang live during the TORCH cosplay event here last July. I didn't know who he was then. I was surprised to find out later that he really does great covers and has quite a following in youtube. I should have gotten an autograph and my picture taken with him. >__<

Well, I hope you enjoy this vid as much as I do. That Kamui Gakupo sure is yummy~

2012-01-27T20:05:00.004+08:00

THE CHAIR

For as long as I can remember, I've always been fond of reading. My mother often tells me that I started to read at age 3, and by age 4 I was already perusing the newspaper. We used to live next door to my cousins, who were avid readers, and I soon followed their footsteps. By third grade I had started my own little library. By fourth grade I was already scrimping my allowance so I could expand my collection. I love reading so much that I would finish skimming all the stories in my English textbook even before the school year starts. I hang out so much at bookstores that relatives often joked that if my parents didn't know my whereabouts, they can easily figure out where I am. (And there was indeed an instance when my parents just randomly strolled into a book fair hoping to find me, and they did!) Back then, my dream job was to be a librarian. To be surrounded by different kinds of books was my ultimate bliss.

As the years went by and other priorities set in, I found less time to read. It didn't stop me from buying books though, or borrowing from friends, cos I still have high hopes of being able to read them "someday soon". And so eventually, I have accumulated quite a long reading list (and also gathered much dust on the shelves). This year, I resolve to catch up on this, with the goal of finishing at least 30 novels this 2012.

And so yesterday, I went to work armed with Ptolemy's Gate, the final installment to the Bartimaeus Trilogy. Luck was on my side, cos there were hardly any patients during my 12-hour shift. As an added bonus, there was a comfy chair in the resident's quarters (see picture above). Oh, what joy! My reading went undisturbed and I finally finished the series.

The Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud is composed of The Amulet of Samarkand (2003), The Golem's Eye (2004) and Ptolemy's Gate (2005). Set in an alternate history of 1930s London, where magic plays a strong role in politics and in shaping world events, this is the story of a gifted and ambitious young magician named Nathaniel, his cheeky five-thousand-year-old djinni Bartimaeus, and a feisty commoner named Kitty Jones. Their lives are intertwined in a series of conflicts, magical adventures and complex conspiracies that will bond them in a destiny that just might save their world.

Initially I found this a bit hard to digest cos the books are quite thick and the fonts quite small. I also thought that it might be a drag, so I kept pushing off reading this series. But when I really focused on it, I realized that it was immensely enjoyable! The story is rich with humor, suspense and excitement that will make you flip page after page and keep you guessing until the end. Since every chapter is told from one of the protagonists' point of view, I can associate and empathize with all three main characters. I particularly looked forward to chapters that are told from Bartimaeus' POV, cos he's such a tease! He likes to brag and make snide and sarcastic comments that often made me guffaw out loud. There are also footnotes in his chapters which give us glimpses of his rich past and explains a lot about his otherworldly attributes. Nat, on the other hand, developed not only physically but also in knowledge and in character. Seeing him grow up and change from book to book makes you wonder expectantly if he will become the typical corrupt magician, or if he does have traits which will make him exceptionally different. And sure enough, I was not disappointed with how he turned out. Kitty's perspective does not appear till the second book, but her character also develops wonderfully and she becomes a significant part of the plot. I especially loved the third novel, since it was so exciting, fast-paced, action-packed, and I won't spoil, but the ending just clinches everything so perfectly and satisfactorily that I am still affected by it even until now, more than 24 hours after finishing it. I thought that each book is separate from the other, but when I read the final installment, it actually connects all the incidents and wraps up the trilogy into a beautiful and epic conclusion. I am certainly most pleased with it! (^o^)/

I really want more of Bartimaeus and I'm so happy to learn that the author has actually released a prequel for this series, called The Ring of Solomon (2010) (Oh~ Thank you so much, Mr Stroud!!!) Although sadly, we won't be hearing more of Nat and Kitty, but I am thrilled that I can read more about our audacious djinni! I hope I can find the book (prolly not in our local bookstores though, maybe in Manila...).

Lately I've only been reading books aimed for children and young adults. Series I've finished in the most recent years include The Chronicles of Narnia, Harry Potter, Twilight, Fablehaven, Daniel X, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, The Hunger Games, Beyonders (first of trilogy), etc etc etc. Series I still have to read are Maximum Ride, The Kane Chronicles, The Heroes of Olympus, A Series of Unfortunate Events, Witch and Wizard, Artemis Fowl, Inkheart, Redwall, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Lord of the Rings, etc etc etc. If you notice, most of these are of the fantasy/adventure genre cos I'm currently only interested in those (although I also have other more "mature" or "serious" materials here). Although I want to write about all of them, but as you can see, I'm kinda bad at describing my reading experiences (what's with all these adjectives that fail to describe @___@). Well, whatever. To blog or not really depends on my mood and my skills in time management. As of now, I'm juggling a lot of activities in my hands, though I feel that I'm still accomplishing nothing and not really serving my real purpose in life. Oh well. I guess I'm off to the next book.

2012-01-23T22:33:00.000+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

❤ May this Year of the Black Water Dragon bring more bishounens into my life. ❤

2012-01-22T19:28:00.007+08:00

TiME LEAP AND FEEDBACK

★ Maybe everything you wished for won't become stars.
But if you have a dream to believe in,
They'll be thousands of the most glittering jewels in the night sky... ★

[Rabid Fangirl Rant Ahead. You Have Been Warned.]

Uta no Prince-sama ~Maji Love 1000%~ is a visual novel-turned-anime series with 13 episodes. It tells the story of Nanami Haruka, a simple girl from the countryside who is inspired to become a composer so that one day she can write a song for her idol. To pursue this dream, she enrolls into the prestigious Saotome Academy, which offers a one-year music program for students to be trained and groomed into performing artists. In this school, she encounters six men, each with a different personality, but all drawn to her and her music.

Thanks to Rei's blog posts and her new lay-out, I have been drawn into this madness! THESE SIX B E A U T I F U L MEN are currently my latest drug! Let me introduce you to Ichinose Tokiya, Ittoki Otoya, Hijirikawa Masato, Jinguuji Ren, Kurusu Shou and Shinomiya Natsuki -- perhaps, better known by their group name, ST☆RISH. I still can't decide which of them is the right prince for me. They're all so gorgeous, can't I just pick ALL OF THEM~❤ !?!?. But if I were to rank them for now, then I'll go for ♥Dark Natsuki♥ (he is just TOO HOT!) followed very closely by ♥Ichinose Tokiya♥ and ♥Ittoki Otoya♥.

They are not only pretty on the outside, but they also make really lovely music (the pop boyband type~♪). I don't usually watch OP and ED themes, but for this anime, I faithfully sat through all of them! It's been a while since I've gone bonkers over anime character songs, perhaps the last time was still back from my med school days, when WeiB Kreuz and Gravitation music tracks accompanied me during my study nights. But now, I'm so obsessed over ST☆RISH to the point that I've gotten hold of all their soundtracks, including drama OSTs and game OSTs! I have also been re-watching their "song scenes" over and over and over. My most favorite songs are the following (in order of the frequency I've re-watched their scenes): Nanairo no Compass by Ichinose Tokiya, BRAND NEW MELODY by Ittoki Otoya and the group's Mirai Chizu. IMO, I think the 3 strongest singers are Ichinose Tokiya, Shinomiya Natsuki, and Jinguuji Ren. But that doesn't mean I don't like the other three. I JUST L❤VE ALL OF THEM~!!! ^___^

I guess eargasm is much expected, as this anime houses a powerful cast of voice actors which includes Sawashiro Miyuki, Miyano Mamoru, Suzumura Kenichi, Suwabe Junichi, Shimono Hiro, Taniyama Kishou, and Terashima Takuma. I think I've fallen in l♥ve with the voice of Miyano Mamoru (the CV of Ichinose Tokiya). Incidentally, he also did the OP theme, ORPHEUS, which is just so awesome. I know he's already a really popular seiyuu with a huge fanbase but now I'm officially jumping into the bandwagon! I think I can listen to him forever! Sakamoto Maaya's so lucky~! But then, he's also lucky to have her. I think they're just a perfect match!!!❤

Well, enough of the colored fonts and ♥hearts♥ and going back to the anime itself....

As I've been ranting, the ARTWORK is eye-candy and the boys are just drawn so beautifully. At first I found Haruka's eyes too pale and weird, but I eventually got used to it. PLOT-wise though, there is not much to be expected.

I think Inagaki Goro might make a great Ichinose Tokiya,
but he's already TOO OLD for the role.

It is a stereotypical reverse harem show, complete with a playboy, a snob, a traditional guy, a mister congeniality, an airhead, a shortie, an eccentric, a mysterious being etc etc etc. The story, in all honesty, is weak and illogical. There are elements like music prodigy (can learn to read music after only one night in ze library WTF!), split personality, secret identity, a mysterious being etc etc etc that I find too far-fetched. And I just can't understand why Ichinose Tokiya and more than anyone, Hijirikawa Masato are trying to be pop idols. They are JUST TOO STIFF AND FORMAL! Hijirikawa is the old-fashioned kind of guy who sports a retro hairstyle and uses a brush to write his letters... and yet he dances perfectly in sync with well, N'SYNC! [ i has proof! click HERE! ]. Ichinose Tokiya, on the other hand, reminds me of Inagaki Goro, who looks so refined and elegant but in my opinion, always looks so out of place in SMAP. BUT RLY... WHO CARES!? When I saw ST☆RISH singing and dancing to Maji LOVE 1000% in the opening of episode 1, I no longer cared about unsubstantial storylines. I just know that I was sold and I've been converted into a *drooling-ogling* fangirl. It was humorous and exciting enough to make me look forward to the next episodes. There were also some scenes that really strike you right in the heart. Two of the most notable moments for me were:

Satsuki's stand-off with Hayato in episode 6, where he expresses his disgust over the latter's halfhearted performance...

"You're in the spotlight, but your true feelings hide in the pitch dark shadows.

It pisses me off.

I'm the dark side of Shinomiya Natsuki, but I don't lie to myself!"

... and in the last episode where Haruka breaks down in front of her grandma ...

"It was so hard, being right there and only looking on...

No matter how much I think about it, I can't understand why I'm not good enough..."

(Somehow, I empathize with her cos in one way or another, I've been through something like that in my life as well.)

Despite the drama-rama in the last two episodes (which Rei has kindly warned me in advance, thank you very much!), in the end I still got all teary-eyed and my heart still went ★DOKI DOKI de kowaresou sen-PAASENT LOVE~ HEY!!★. (un)Fortunately, Haruka doesn't really choose among the six boys ~~cos she's too greedy she wants all of them~~ and they all end up happily ever after. I'd rather remove Haruka from the picture though, and end the anime with THIS:

♥ ♥ ♥ YEHEY FOR BL PAiRiNGS!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

WHAT!!?? With the fanservice they were offering, this was inevitable!!!! ~~I browsed through image sites and all I got were~~ ~~yummy delicious boys love images, fanarts, doujin arts...~~ *ahem!* I mean, I just want everyone to know that this is a perfectly normal heterosexual anime series, and there's no *cough!* bromance whatsoever *cough!*. I'm looking forward to playing the PSP game, listening to all the albums, and even more enthusiastic for the upcoming second season of the anime. Yes! A second season is very much on its way! And so this is not the last time we will be enchanted by our adorable princes, and definitely, not the last time you will hear me fangirl over them! *winks~*

2012-01-18T23:37:00.012+08:00

ON LETTING GO. AND MOVING ON.

So. I have finally learned to let go and move on.

Today, I finally had the resolve to text all the consultants and staff of my previous workplace, including our big boss -- to inform them that I have officially resigned from the hospital, to appreciate them for all their guidance and teachings, and most importantly, to thank them for the friendship and memories we have developed during the past three years.

It was not easy for me though. I cried when I texted them, and I cried again when they texted me back. I held back tears and tried not to make my voice break when they called me up. Maybe my tendency to have "delayed reactions" helped, so I can at least act cheerful and positive about everything for the meantime. I can pretend that everything's OK, and everything's going as planned. Which, so far, is... not. ~__~

I am officially jobless. I, being the breadwinner of the family, have no idea how I'm gonna put food on the table, pay for the rent and bills, buy my father's medicines... Sure, I still have some savings for now, but everyone knows how money can easily go down the drain. And how long will I remain without work? Without a stable source of income? Perhaps, only God knows.

Still, I am not unemployed. Because technically, I cannot be unemployed. Being a physician is like having the profession ingrained in your skin -- you just can't rub it off. Even if I have left work, I am still a doctor of medicine. Even if I stay home and bum around the whole month, it doesn't make me less of a physician (albeit just a lazy one). And that was initially my plan. For this month, I wanted to idle in the house, clean my room, watch my animes, sing Bruno Mars' The Lazy Song, and do nothing at all~ ♪♪♫♪

But NO. That did not happen.

What happened was that the past week, I have been working. I don't know if friends and non-friends actually heard news of my resignation, or just by sheer chance decided to text me, but I have been requested by not one, not two, not three but FOUR different institutions to relieve duties for their doctors. Two of these were actually big hospitals in the city and the other two were company clinics. At first I was hesitant to accept any offers, since I didn't want to adjust to new environments, system and people. But I figured beggars can't be choosers and that it's wrong to reject blessings, so I decided to just go with the flow. Fighting feelings of fear, confusion and inadequacy, I faced these new places as challenges. And somehow, I find myself not only rewarded with monetary returns, but also with a sense of excitement and satisfaction from my accomplishments. I am fired up to go the extra mile and improve myself more.

But... I must admit, I am not that strong. And often I find myself afraid and worried. I constantly wonder when I'll reach my limit, until when I can pretend that everything is well, if I can still keep up putting a nonchalant smile in front of my parents when they ask to buy groceries and stuffs. I do wonder how long I can live on these odd jobs, if I'll be able to earn as much as before and provide my family with the comfort that they have grown used to. Sometimes I find myself scrimping on taxi and riding the jeepney (or even walking!), or just turning my back on fastfood shops and going home instead to eat leftovers, and I try to laugh it off and not make a big deal of it. It pains me but I push all of these at the back of my mind.

Some may think me foolish to have quit a stable job and turn my back on substantial salary, but I have my reasons. I don't want to talk about them anymore because they're all in the past, and I want them to stay buried in the past. I really needed to break free. Besides, it's about time I made a move to upgrade my career. Most of my friends are already in residency programs, or have finished their training. Although I am very proud and happy for them, and I know this is not a race and that we move at our own pace, yet I also cannot deny that I am envious of their achievements. Sometimes I remember the years, and think if I may have wasted my time away. But I don't want to see it that way. I know everything happens for a reason. I want to believe in my heart that I have been strengthened and perhaps, made wiser and better by the various events I have gone through. I want to fondly look back, and reminisce only beautiful and good memories of the people, places and experiences I have encountered.

I will surely miss my friends in Malaybalay City, especially Mam Cha.

I hardly took pictures when I was there, so that makes me very sad right now.

Despite all these, I want everyone to understand that I have peace, and I know that I'm secure. There is a Certainty in the uncertain -- which is God -- and this is where I rest my faith. I know He makes all things possible, that He will pull me through these, that He will be my guide and my support. I trust in His unfailing love, and in His wonderful promises. I know this is only a phase in my life that I need to overcome, and I pray that through this, I may glorify His Name more and more. One of the Bible passages I really love right now is this:

Matthew 6:26-34 (New Living Translation)
Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your Heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to Him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, He will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your Heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."

So what is in store for me in the very near future? I really do not know. But what I do know right now is this: As long as SOPA/PIPA doesn't push through, I promise to continue to update my blog with my exciting adventures into the unknown. And I hope that whoever of you is reading this will continue to support me and join me in my journey.

2012-01-07T00:24:00.001+08:00

* * * H A P P Y 2 0 1 2 ! * * *

Before saying it becomes passé, let me greet everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

(coin art.. w00t!)

I don't plan on making a long entry about my new year's resolutions, plans, etc... I've done those before and well, nothing really happened. XD But my theme for this year would be "Out with the old, and In with the New" as I am praying for new and exciting changes in my life.

First of all of course is to change my planner...

Owning a planner is very important for me cos I love to make little notes/doodles, and it helps me keep track of many aspects of my life. I picked the oak-colored Starbucks planner to be my trusted partner for 2012. It's smaller than last year's planner and though I don't really like the lay-out that much, but I think we will make many many sweet memories together for this year. This is my third SB planner in a row, and perhaps, my last. My boyfriend and I decided that we will start saving up some moolah and hence will stop buying luxurious items such as these (~~we will buy Moleskine planners instead!!!~~). Cholo and I also plan to stop being impulsive spenders, to be more disciplined, and SRSLY lose some weight. We have big visions for our not-so-distant future, and we really need to keep our focus and tighten our pockets to achieve our goals.

After ranting about the importance of money, ironically, the next major change in my life right now is that I've resigned from my job effective the first day of this year for reasons that I don't want to expound anymore. Suffice it to say that I just wanted to get out of my comfort zone and move on with my life. I know it's a bit foolish to leave behind a stable, relatively good-paying job, especially with both my parents jobless right now. But I have given it a lot of thought, discussed it with a lot of significant people, and most importantly, prayed about it. So I'm seeing this as a leap of faith, as an act of complete surrender and dependence on God's greater plan for me. I do not know what the future holds, but I know my God holds my future. Yes, I am very much afraid, but I am really looking forward to see what doors of opportunities will open and what exciting experiences await me for this year.

Since I'll be (hopefully) having a lot of free time in my hands for the first couple of weeks of 2012, I really want to make good use of this chance to organize my life, my priorities and... my room! I have hoarded lots of stuffs last year like books, mangas, DVDs, etc and I really need to stop doing that cos I don't really have the space to hold them and the time to use them. After the tragedy of super tyyphoon Sendong, of which our apartment was also not spared (we were flooded till knee level!), we have come to realize that in just one snap, everything material could easily be taken away from you. And I know this is quite silly cos my hoards have no eternal value, but still, if I can, I want to really make good use of them. So I have set some realistic(?) challenges for myself and hopefully I will be able to do them this year;

Read and study the Bible twice everyday
Finish the entire Bible twice this year
Blog at least once or twice a week
Make at least 30 new artworks
Read at least 30 books
Watch at least 30 drama/TV series
Watch at least 60 anime series
Read at least 100 mangas
Watch at least 300 movies

I know the above list is quite ridiculous and shows only the irrational, materialistic side of me, but setting such quota may be able to help me make better use of my time. I want to stop wasting my energy and time on staring blankly at social network sites, or playing insignificant games, and be more productive. Of course if there are more important things to do for my spiritual or career growth, my family and friends and real-life matters, these would naturally take precedence. But I don't want to waste any more time and energy doing useless things that will not make me a better individual. I hope this will indeed be a more fruitful year.

As Joel Osteen said in his bestselling book, "I've made up my mind to not waste any more days. I'm celebrating each as a gift from God." Here's wishing all of us a great year of celebration ahead.

2012-01-03T22:20:00.001+08:00

INJURED!

What a way to start the new year -- I almost lost my finger today! @___@

And it's NOT because of fireworks (cos I don't touch that~) nor food preparation (cos I don't do that~).

Let me tell you the gory-turned-funny story...

It was almost 6am but still dusky outside. Since my mom and my sister were sleeping with me in my cramped room, I was forced to convert my small couch into my bed, and the electric fan was positioned just above my head. The fan's blades are (fortunately) made of plastic, but it's one of those really strong fans commonly referred to as industrial fans. Now I tend to move a lot in my sleep and I think I must have unconsciously stretched my arms or something, and accidentally stuck my finger into the fan! I immediately jolted awake cos of the excruciating pain, and I realized that blood was already dripping from my left ring finger. I really thought it was a goner. I turned on my flashlight and grabbed some tissues (funny that I didn't really think of turning on the lights). I sat on my couch, teary-eyed, clutching my bleeding finger while thanking God for the usefulness of elbows (yes, I was still that groggy!). Then I wrapped tissue around it and held it together with masking tape, before waking up my mom and sister to tell them what happened. My sister was alarmed, but do you know how my equally-groggy mom responded!?

She said: "So, are you going to show it in Facebook!?"

And the three of us just burst out laughing.

So much for being injured. It was SRSLY so painful, but everyone just treated it as a joke. ~__~

2011-12-26T15:58:00.000+08:00

MOBILE BLOGGING?

I'm now attempting to make a blog entry using my phone and using the mobile browser, Opera Mini. The idea of mobile blogging excites me, but I know this carries some risks as well. And somehow, punching the keypad and staring at my mini-phone screen just doesn't feel as natural as typing in front of my desktop.

Still, this is something exciting since I can now easily update my blog (unless laziness strikes first! XD). Maybe if I get a better phone/gadget, I can have better access. But of course, that's out of the budget for now. >_<

Now pressing "OK" and let's all see if this works....

2011-11-29T16:36:00.001+08:00

MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR!

A few months back, I have mentioned several books titles I've been wanting to read, and one of them was the young adult post-apocalyptic trilogy, THE HUNGER GAMES, by Suzanne Collins. I have been compelled to buy the set several times, yet I always change my mind when I reach the cashier (mostly out of fear of being disappointed, and out of fear of my growing collection of unread books). Fortunately, a friend lent me her copy last July, and so I had the opportunity to read and experience it.

My initial opinion of the plot -- a group of teenagers in a dystopic setting forced to fight each other to the death -- is that it is nothing new. If you are familiar with the controversial Japanese pulp classic Battle Royale by Takami Koushun, then you'd be quick to say that HG is a rip-off. This further piqued my curiosity and interest, as I wanted to see for myself how similar or different the stories are. And I guess I can safely say that although the main concept might be alike, but the society they live in, the culture and mentality that they have, and the execution of the storylines are quite different, so it would be fair if we should just stop comparing them and see them both as independent works.

That aside and going back to my Hunger Games reading experience... The trilogy consists of The Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay. Maybe because of the hype and my high expectations, but I actually ended up having mixed opinions about it. I didn't like it as much as I wanted to. For one thing, although the main characters -- the protagonist Katniss Everdeen and her two love interests, Gale Hawthorne and Peeta Mellark -- all have their strong traits, yet I just couldn't bring myself to like any of them (although if I must choose, I'll be in Team Gale! XD). It's not that I don't like romance in my novels. As a matter of fact, I relish it! But somehow, I find the romantic development in their dog-eat-dog world a bit... off. Their situation and their personalities are too psycho and bitter to actually make me feel "kilig". I find Katniss quite indifferent yet very fickle with her emotions, very much like Bella flitting between Edward and Jacob, so I didn't like that one bit. (Although yes, you may easily argue that she acts that way because the situation calls for it, and I can understand that. But it still doesn't bring her close to my heart XD). Then there are some supporting characters who seemingly have great potentials to become more than they are, but they get killed. (Yes, I know it is expected since they are jut ordinary kids, but I just couldn't help but feel grumpy over it). There are also certain twists in the plot which I didn't particularly like, not because they were unhappy, but just because they are just conveniently there, if you know what I mean. No, you don't, cos I don't either. >__< Well, let's just leave it at that cos I don't know how to expound on this and further writing only brings more confusion. ^w^

I do admit that it had enough combination of angst and thrill to hold my attention for several days, and so I was quick to finish the books. One thing I realized about the HG trilogy is that it is not to be judged as individual books, but to be seen and read as a continuing series of events. I was honestly quite disappointed with the first book, but the pace for me picked up in Catching Fire when I realized that the first part was only the tip of an iceberg and there is more to the story than I initially thought. I like how the nation of Panem was envisioned by the author, with its own rich history, government, structure and culture, however sick and distorted it may be. I like how the capitol and districts have been organized, and how they set-up the games. Face it, I'm such a sucker for alternate societies/settings like this so I easily take a fancy on such stuffs. Overall, it was an entertaining read for me. But, like the Twilight series, I wouldn't think of reading it again, or buying my own copy.

BUT!!! I will definitely watch the upcoming movie adaptation set to be released on March 2012. I think this will be another young adult novel turned movie franchise that will spawn gadzillions of screaming fans and even more bickering haters. Watching the trailer doesn't particularly excite me, but like the books, it has piqued my curiosity and interest once again. Fans all over have gone in a frenzy agreeing or disagreeing over the choice of leads. I, however, have no particular preference or comment for the cast, except that maybe they are not who I exactly pictured in my mind. But as I have no particular fandom over Katniss, Peeta or Gale, so I don't really care. I did browse through the credentials of these actors, and they seem rather talented and suitable for the roles. Anyway, it is expected that novels brought to the big screens don't exactly come out the way everyone wants, so let's just wait, keep our minds open, and see the movie for ourselves.

LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

2011-11-29T05:02:00.000+08:00

UNVEILING THE NEW ME!

Hello! It's been a while since my last blog update. I have no excuses whatsoever though, and I have no plans of making one of those explanation entries again. The past has passed, what's done is done...

Well, on to very recent stuffs... I have some sort of equation here for you...

Q: What do you get by adding up an expensive hair salon + Takano glasses + hair dye?

A: You get this story, of course! (Plus a ~~creepy~~ bonus at the end!)

I've always wanted a new physical look, but have always been afraid to try because I know my face is too big and round for its own good. I wanted to get full bangs, get curls and dye my hair an unnatural shade of brown/orange/red/blue/etc, much like this lovely lady on the left side. But I know I cannot pull it off unless I lose much of the flab in my face (and on almost all parts of my body! >__< Besides, my mother would never agree to such radical hair colors!) So every time I go to beauty parlors and the hairdresser asks for my preference, I always chicken out. Hence, I've been sporting the same boring hairdo for perhaps almost ten years now!?! ＿|￣|O

And ever since I've laid my eyes on Takano Masamune from the NSFW anime/manga Sekaiichi Hatuskoi, I've been ~~wanting him~~ *coughs* wanting to get similar eyeglasses like his: all black, rectangular, maybe made of plastic. Well I have been looking in various optical shops, yet so far, my search is in vain.

Finally today, when my mom and I went to the mall, I decided to get a haircut and that full bangs that I've been wanting. So we went to this salon which was quite pricey and after getting shampooed, I proceeded in picking different hairstyles from their catalogue. Sadly, the stylist kept saying "NO GOOD!" to all of my choices, and the language barrier makes it so much difficult to understand his reasons. I felt exasperated and told him to do whatever he wants with my hair but not to cut it too long or too short. So he just gave me a trim. u__u I did get my full bangs, but with a warning that it will be quite difficult to maintain. (Whatever.) So now, I actually don't quite understand my hair. I don't know if I like it or not. >__<

Then afterwards, while strolling around the mall, I chanced upon rectangular reading glasses very much like Takano's! It was on sale and was quite cheap, so I'm not sure if it can last long if I use it everyday. Although it fits snugly on my face, I'm not sure if it looks good on me. I did buy it, but I'm still thinking if I should get corrective lenses fitted on it, or just continue using my old eyeglasses.

When we got home, my mother offered to apply some color on my hair. I have a box of L'oreal hair dye which I got last month, so we decided to use that. For the record, I did choose various unnatural colors at the cosmetics shop, but my mom wouldn't let me get them, so we finally settled on Mahogany Copper Brown. I've had abundant white hair strands since fifth grade, yet it's actually my first time to apply color on my hair, so it was quite the new experience for me.

And the outcome?

Ta-dah!

(Remember Kim Sam Soon? Albeit, a fatter version. LOL)

I know. It's not the best look for me. But, I reckon it's still a good mugshot.
And me wearing orange is quite a funny but appropriate coincidence.

2011-07-14T22:46:00.037+08:00

HOARD YOUR HORSES!

(irrelevant title x.x)

Joseon X-Files... Playful Kiss... Secret Garden... Sungkyungkwan Scandal... My Princess... 49 Days... City Hunter...

I just noticed that I've been downloading a lot of Korean dramas lately. (Note that I said "downloading" and NOT "watching" >__<).

Now I have decided to catch up on my Taiwanese dramas, so I did some research, and here are some of my choices:

First stop are dramas which have finished airing early this year...

愛似百匯 / Ai Si Bai Hui (aka Love Buffet ) is a 13-episode drama starring Yu Hong Yuan flanked by the two Fahrenheit boys, Aaron Yan and Calvin Chen. If I'm not mistaken, this series was based on the well-known manga Parfait Tic, but I'm just not familiar with it...

Beside it is 國民英雄 / Guo Min Ying Xiong (aka Channel-X ) which is a mystery thriller starring Joe Cheng and Amber Kuo. I have yet to see Papa Joe in an semi-action role, so I think I'm gonna get this one too.

This next set are currently airing dramas...

The first two pictures are both dramas starring Mike He -- 幸福最晴天 / Xing Fu Zui Qing Tian (aka Sunny Happiness) and
美樂加油 / Mei Le Jia You (aka Love Keeps Going, Mei Le Go!). Now I'm not much of a Mike He fan, but I thought of also putting these on the roster.

The next one -- 拜金女王 / Bai Jin Nu Wang (aka Material Queen) -- is a wannabe-rich girl x poor guy story starring Vanness Wu and Lynn Hung. Now, Vanness did a spectacular job in Autumn's Concerto (I haven't seen it yet, but I heard from friends) and so I'm looking forward to more of his projects.

醉後決定愛上你 / Zui Hou Jue Ding Ai Shang Ni (aka Love You / Drunken to Love You) stars Rainie Yang and Joseph Chang as total strangers who got drunk and then got married to each other. I first read about this in Song Yong In's blog and has listed this one at the back of my mind. Maybe it's high time to finally secure a copy.

This next one is an upcoming 2012 drama called 我可能不會愛你 / Wo Ke Neng Bu Hui Ai Ni (aka In time With You / I May Not Love You) starring Ariel Lin and Wilson Chen Bo Lin. The premise of the story seems interesting, and I find it appropriate for me cos I'm around that age too. Plus I just love Ariel Lin! So I hope to watch this when it comes out.

These last three series are Taiwanese Dramas adapted from Japanese mangas starring Korean actors.

Huuuwhhhaaatttt!?! O____o

I know right!? That's just SO WEIRD! ^o^ It's not a bad kind of weird though, but I just find it ... peculiar.

Anyway, these are really great titles, so I'm quite excited about them!

旋風管家 / Xuan Feng Guan Jia
(aka Hayate the Combat Butler)

This series totally caught me by surprise because I really didn't expect Hayate the Combat Butler to give rise to a TV drama.
I haven't read the manga but I have been meaning to watch the anime, and now I've started downloading the first three drama episodes, subbed by DoReMii.

Took a quick scan of the first episode, and it looks quite enjoyable. Park Shin Hye takes the role of the rich heiress, while George Hu makes a really cute butler! ^w^

華麗的挑戰 / Hua Li De Tiao Zhan
(aka Skip Beat! / Extravagant Challenge)

Originally from the well-loved manga/anime of the same title, Skip Beat! was one of the dramas I was looking forward to last year, because the original cast was supposedly Jerry Yan and Ariel Lin.

Well for some reasons, they've changed the female protagonist to Ivy Chen, and the male leads to Super Junior's Choi Si Won and Lee Dong Hae. I'm no fan of the group so I don't know these guys, but this isn't their first time to act in a TV series, so let's just wait and see.

絕對達令 / Jue Dui Darling
(aka Absolute Boyfriend)

Based on Watase Yuu's famous manga, ZETTAI KARESHI, which also spawned a live action J-drama in 2008, this upcoming series stars Wu Chun from the boyband Fahrenheit, and Korean actress Goo Hye Sun, who rose to fame in Boys Over Flowers.

Well, that's it for now. Drop me a line and tell me what you think. And if I missed out on any good dramas, tell me too!! My hoard mode is on, and once I free some disk space, I'll hopefully get all of these rolling... ^o<

2011-07-14T14:23:00.002+08:00

SUGGESTED READING MATERIALS

My cousin's son, Shan, is a voracious reader, and probably reads faster and more avidly than me. I have mentioned in a previous blog entry that we exchanged some of our books. He immediately finished all of the novels I lent him, while I, until now, have finished only four of his books (blame in on the unlimited supply of patients! >__< but don't worry, I'll catch up!) I'm really quite excited that I share similar reading interests with my 10-year old nephew, and hence I've come up with a list of suggested reading materials, most of them of the fantasy/adventure genre, which my cousin might want to buy for her son (and which I can hopefully leech in the future XD). I haven't read any of these and chose these based on my own preferences, so I cannot assure anyone if these books are any good. But I provided links so you can check these titles out for yourselves.

Dragon Rider

by Cornelia Funke, author of the Inkworld series

Heroes of the Valley

by Jonathan Stroud, author of the Bartimaeus Trilogy

Beyonders : A World Without Heroes

by Brandon Mull, author of the Fablehaven series

This is the first of three books.

The Emerald Atlas

by John Stephens

The first in the Books of Beginning trilogy.

The Hunger Games Trilogy

by Suzanne Collins

I'm not sure if I should recommend this to my nephew, since it gives me the impression of a violent dystopian world akin to that of Battle Royale. And hence, I'm not sure if kids his age should read it. But among all these novels, this set has been particularly calling out to me very loudly for the past few months. I must admit that I've taken this box set several times near the cashier, but have always promptly stopped myself and returned it back to the shelf. Now, I've just borrowed a copy of this trilogy, and will try to read it soon. If at any point I will immensely enjoy reading this, I will buy a set for myself right away.

The Mysterious Benedict Society Series

by Trenton Lee Stewart

Currently there are three books in the market:

01 - The Mysterious Benedict Society

02 - The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey

03 - The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Prisoner's Dilemma

The Inheritance Cycle

by Christopher Paolini

The first book is the basis for the movie of the same title.

(And on a side note, was actually the first movie my boyfriend and I watched together on a date. XD)

This was initially a trilogy, but the author decided to publish a fourth book, set to be released November 2011.

01- Eragon // 02 - Eldest // 03 - Brisinger // 04 - Inheritance

The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel

by Michael Scott

This is a series of six fantasy novels, five of which are already published.

01 - The Alchemyst // 02 - The Magician // 03 - The Sorceress

04 - The Necromancer // 05 - The Warlock // 06 - The Enchantress (May 2012)

Septimus Heap Series

by Angie Sage

I'm not quite sure how many books there are in this series, but currently there's already six of them out in bookstores.

01 - Magyk // 02 - Flyte // 03 - Physik

04 - Queste // 05 - Syren // 06 - Darke

Actually I have some other titles in mind, but these are my choice picks for now. I would buy these myself I have the funds, and "another" bookshelf (since the recent one I bought is already overflowing >__<). But for now, I have decided that it's impractical cos I need to save money and our current apartment is too cramped. Also, an important factor is that I'm busy with work yet I hoard too much, so most likely I won't have the time to read these anyway. So if other people can buy these and will just let me borrow, then I think that would help me a lot. ^_______^

2011-07-11T01:13:00.001+08:00

δυσθυμία

Somehow, nothing just seems to be going well, or right.

Work has been wonderful, until I found out that I was oblivious to the fact that I was already actually in a very nasty spotlight. Now I just want to quit my job. Everything now seems like a lie. Everyone's a fake. There is no one to trust.

Should such a thing happen, then I don't know what's my next step in life.

In fact, I just don't know what to do with my life anymore. In ALL aspects of my life. Be it with my career, with my love life, with my family and friends, with my hobbies...

I don't know what the future has for me. I cannot envision anything. I am desperately trying to hold on to the belief that God holds my future. But all I see now is NOTHINGNESS.

I have no idea what to do with my gadzillions of books, animes, dramas, files, and stuffs. Things just pile up, and I allow them to pile up. Yet they are all cluttered and in disarray. Hoarding seems to be a way out, yet it also keeps me in. How ironic.

Went out today looking for three books. Didn't find a single one of them. Those books were lying around for weeks and nobody buys them. Just when I decide to buy them, they disappear from the shelves. Just... GREAT.

Was playing a game that I totally enjoyed, and thought that perhaps, it was something I'm good at. Then system crashed and data file was corrupted. Lost all 50++ hours worth of gaming. What a waste of time and effort. I am such a loser.

I guess I've always been a loser, in many ways. Never the best, always second or worse, falling too short of everyone's expectations, including my own. I am sorry I let everyone down. I am sorry I have failed so many times. Made all the wrong decisions. Made all the crazy choices.

I have limited money now, and will probably quit from my job sooner than later. Yet I keep squandering what little cash I have. I am a total nutcase. A sad excuse for a human.

I committed to do something, but I fear of doing it. I fear people's reactions. I fear their criticisms. I fear that I am just not good enough. And perhaps that's true.

I want to do something, yet nobody f***ing supports me. Or believes in me. I now feel like cr@p for even thinking about it in the first place. I will never be able to do that. I will never have the chance.

I am hating every part of me right now. I hate how I look and how I'm fat and how I just don't conform to what society wants to see. I hate how I am. I hate me. I hate every part of me.

Don't bother saying something nice. It won't make a difference.

Maybe I'll be fine in a few days. Just, PLEASE, LEAVE ME ALONE.

2011-05-16T22:10:00.003+08:00

A FREAKY STORY

Last night I was still in the hospital because I had to assist an operation. We finished quite late, and it was already around 10:30pm when I got back to my room. I was alone at the third floor that time, since my partner's still in the ER and no other doctors were currently occupying the rooms. I was planning to clean up my stuffs, but I thought I should get a drink of water first. So I went out of my room to the end of the hallway, where the water dispenser stood.

I got me a glass of cold water and then sat on the couch, which was near the windows. Suddenly, I heard a soft "wssst..." behind me. I was a bit freaked out but I tried to remain calm, dismissing it as my imagination and continued sipping my water. However, a few minutes later, I heard a very loud "WSSSSSTTTT!!!!" which came from the hallway, and it made me look up, but of course no one... nothing... was there.

I felt all the hairs in my skin stand, and I quickly shuffled back to my room, without bothering to glance around.

I don't even want to know what's lurking behind the shadows.... T___T

Remember this story??? x__x

2011-05-11T22:17:00.001+08:00

MEET BROOKE SHIELDS

I've been ~~hoarding~~ collecting a lot of books lately, most of which were on sale. And as the number of books increased alarmingly in my room, I realized that there was already a need to buy a shelf to hold them in. Fortunately, I found the perfect one last month, but since my room was still such a huge mess then, I didn't buy it immediately. It was only last week when I've finally cleaned up the room a bit, and so the shelf was bought and delivered yesterday.

I know owning a bookshelf would make me happy, but when I saw it standing in my room, I suddenly just had this indescribable joy within me. It was beautiful! Then I remembered that when I was still a kid, and reading was still such a passionate hobby for me, I've always wanted a bookshelf I could call my own. So it was just like fulfilling a childhood dream! I was in absolute bliss! *^__^*

So here are close-up photos of my shelf, whose name by the way is Brooke Shields. Why? Well, it's a little complicated to explain, so I'll just leave it that way for you to wonder... XD

Top layer shows my latest books, which are mostly in sets.

Second layer holds all mangas, most of which are works by Clamp!

Big books at the far end are my Card Captor Sakura and Disgaea artbooks.

Third layer contains more mangas, including those I got from Japan, and my complete set of Slam Dunk.

Bottom layer holds my Dr Seuss collection, classic novels, etc etc etc

Lately I also got to chat with my cousin, and she told me her 10-year old son is an avid reader of fantasy books. It's so amazing how her little boy Shan can understand these kinds of books and how fast he can read them! I am just so proud of this kid.

So after much convo, we decided to exchange books! So I let her borrow some of my stuffs...

Lost by Gregory Maguire; Daniel X books 1-2 by James Patterson; The Thief Lord by Cornelia Funke;

Artemis Fowl books 1-3-4-5-6 and The Supernaturalist by Eoin Colfer

... and she also lets me borrow her son's books...

Percy Jackson series (complete set of 5 books) by Rick Riordan;

Fablehaven series (books 1-4) by Brandon Mull;

The Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud; The Lost Hero by Rick Riordan

*jumps around in joy*

Seeing so many books and seeing them in my shelf just makes me so so so so HAPPY!!!! ^_____________^

I wanna just curl up and read all of these!!!

2011-05-06T10:41:00.000+08:00

UNCLUTTERED CLUTTER

Whenever I make a mess of my room and have no more time to finish cleaning, I usually just put all the unfiled stuffs into a huge plastic bag and stash it into a big box. Over the months, said box became full, and so last night around 730pm, I decided to open it and organize the contents. Things went pretty well at first and I was able to throw out a lot of useless stuffs. But around 1am, I started to feel sleepy and tired, and then panicked when I realized that everything was still everywhere in my room. I sleep on the floor so if I couldn't finish cleaning up, then it also means I couldn't sleep yet. :(

I quickly decided to just set aside all the clutter just to make space for my mattress. And after a few minutes...

VOILA! The disarranged is arranged! ^___^

Because of my obsessive-compulsive personality, it takes me quite a while to arrange my stuffs, and boy, do I like to collect a lot of useless stuffs. It's very easy for me to pour out all my things on the floor, but most of the time, I find it difficult to bring them together. It's like disassembling a jigsaw puzzle and then realizing that I can't put back the pieces. Or maybe I can, but it would take a really long time. And this frustrates me because I want to be a surgeon. And one of my fears is that I might open up something and I might not be able to fix it back. That would be like, so freaky. >___<

2011-05-05T22:07:00.001+08:00

MY PHONE

Mama's cellphone has always been hand-me-downs from either my aunt or my sister, so I have been promising to get her a phone that's brand new. I gave her a Nokia 5310 for Christmas 2009 but after a few days she gave it to Papa because he was impressed with its music/video features, and so she went back to her old phone again. It took a while before I started looking around for another suitable model to give her, and I finally decided on the touch-and-type Nokia C3-01. Ma's not very techie and is not so good with gadgets, but I want her to be trendy. Besides, she had that high school reunion to attend (which I'll write about next time) and I wanted her to look good in front of her old friends. So as an early Mother's Day gift, we bought said phone unit two weeks ago. She's quite used to it by now and I'm happy that she seems pleased with it.

I own two cellphones and both already look quite shabby. The keypad from my Nokia 5000 even came off last month and I just used double-sided tape to fix it temporarily. My feelings of euphoria and envy after getting Mama a new phone coupled with my impulsive and compulsive personality brought me to a MyPhone shop, and so I also got myself a brand new white Q19i! Now, it wasn't really a totally random decision since I know 3 people who own the same unit and I have been receiving great feedbacks from them. One friend even boasted that her Q19i fell to the floor yet it's still working so well. So I have been thinking about this phone for a while for the following reasons:

I want to try a Dual Sim phone.
I want to try a QWERTY phone. I want to buy a Blackberry but it's too expensive. :(
I want a cheap but sturdy phone that can support my ~~careless~~ carefree lifestyle.

And so here's my Q19i phone!

I named it Takahiro cos my current message alert tone is Junjou Romantica Mini Drama 8 from the second OST, and it's Usagi-san saying something like, "Takahiro no otouto wa..." in his deep sexy voice. ^__^♥

Now I won't be writing an in-depth review of this phone cos I'm just too lazy to do that. So far though, it's been quite easy to use, and so convenient to be carrying around just one phone with my two sim cards. I like its clean look, and people get readily attracted to it cos it seems like some high end phone (from afar XD). I thought my fat fingers would have a hard time punching in those letters (main reason I'm not getting a touch screen phone), but surprisingly, it's not that difficult at all. There are also shortcut functions (like the space bar can open the music player), and when making SMS, there are two buttons - alt and up - which function like the shift key, making it easier to access the punctuation marks, numbers, etc. Since it has an expandable memory of up to 4gb, I loaded it with lots of mp3s and images which seem to work fine. I particularly enjoy customizing my new phone, and immediately placed a b&w Kimi no Todoke♥ pic as my wallpaper.

Cool, huh? ^___^

Downsides... The audio's not really anything special, and if you're mainly using your phone for playing music, then I suggest you look for something else. But the speaker is really loud, so it's quite an effective alarm clock. The lay-out's a bit tacky, but I don't really care that much. Camera's quite fuzzy, I don't even think this is VGA. And multitasking makes the phone functions lag a bit, say you're using the music player and then you text, it seems a split second slower than usual. Sometimes, when the phone rings and you press the answer (or silent/reject) key, it may take a while to respond, so it may keep on ringing for a few seconds longer than you intend for it to. And I did mention that the speaker is quite loud, so the persistent ringing may be a bit embarrassing especially in public. It cannot connect to wifi, but that's fine with me since I'm not much into mobile internet anyway.

By next month I'm getting my Nokia C3 (my boyfriend's birthday gift for me which has been lying in its box in QC since February) so I might have to say goodbye to Takahiro soon. My mother is eagerly awaiting for it to be transferred into her open hands, since she also own multiple phones (besides the new one I gave her). So our bonding time together might be short-lived, but I'm maximizing and enjoying every minute of it. ^o^

2011-05-05T05:26:00.001+08:00

NOT-SO-MAJOR-MAJOR REVAMP TO BECOME LIKE A FLOWER

I was writing about something else, but I somehow ended up making a new banner for my blog. It needed to change anyway, since version 8.5 was supposedly just for the Christmas season. And so I tinkered around with stuffs, and now it's 5-ish am, and I didn't get to sleep! Oh well... ^__^;

Proudly presenting my brand new banner and blog title, Hana ni Nare!

This time we say hello to Komiyama Yoh and Nagashima Haruna, one of my most favorite couples from one of my most favorite mangas, Koukou Debut!♥ Even though I've read this over and over, but I still get major goosebumps whenever I see these two lovey-dovey together.♥ It took me a while to pick the pictures to use. I was initially planning on using one image only, but somehow ended up with so many, and finally decided to pick four. They don't totally match the words, but I'm too tired and excited to care anymore! =P

Hana ni Nare is the title from one of my most favorite songs from one of my most favorite bands, flumpool. The Japanese text reads: 笑って泣いて歌って花になれ (Waratte Naite Utatte Hana ni Nare), and was taken from beautiful lyrics that went like this:

"Laugh, cry, sing, and become a flower. Blossom fully, then one day overflow your radiance."

I'll post the PV here and you can get complete lyrics from HERE.

(Yamamura Ryuta is oh-so-delicioso ~ ♥)

I put all of these together using MS Paint, because I live in a cave and has nada Photoshop skills. Maybe it's a little bland and boring, but it suits me just fine. ^___^

Why Yoh and Haruna, and why Hana ni Nare? Well, simply because in the manga you see Yoh and Haruna grow, develop and bloom to their fullest with each other's support. And since the start of this blog, it has been my aim to grow, develop, and bloom to my fullest piffle princess potentials as well. But of course that's just random explanation I made up. I just really wanted to make a Koukou Debut banner, and I just wanted to plug flumpool. =P

Now it's time to hit the sack. z___z

2011-02-07T20:52:00.019+08:00

A GIFT FROM THE HEART

One of our nurses told me that my patient last year, who was her neighbor, had prepared a Christmas gift for me. I was so surprised! I've never received anything from my patients (except for occasional words of gratitude and some food), but this was my first time to get something material. So I was just at a loss for words when I got this:

A PINK Pillow! ^____^

Even a lot more unexpected was this lovely note which came with the gift...

I immediately went teary-eyed and felt my heart throb when I saw this. Her gift may not be extraordinary and her message short, but somehow, I can just feel her sincerity and appreciation in this simple gesture. I honestly didn't know how to react. I cannot even recall her face, yet she remembered me. Our nurse said that I apparently admitted, treated then discharged Mrs Murillo early from the hospital so she could go home and feed her pets, and that made her really happy and grateful to me. XD

Right now, I think I am even happier and more grateful to her. This is one of the best things that has happened in my life, and has made me extremely glad that I'm a doctor. ^________^

2011-01-28T20:37:00.023+08:00

TINAPAY NA, NAGING BATO PA

I was the resident-on-duty two nights ago. It was around 8pm, and I was on my way up to my room, when I passed by Nurse Station 1 and noticed a tall, lanky guy lurking around the nurses' table. When he saw me, he immediately turned around and walked up the ramp which led to the second floor. I took a peek to see if he has left, but I noticed that a man's shadow was still visible. The Station 1 Nurse came back from the wards, and I asked her if she knew that suspicious guy. She said she didn't know him. I told her I was gonna report the incident to our pharmacist, and left my bag, my bible, my tumbler, and some documents in the nurses' table.

It took me just a few minutes to describe the questionable person to our pharmacist, who promptly told our security guard. It kinda felt awkward to pass judgement on someone without any evidence, but I felt very uneasy about the whole thing. I headed back to Nurse Station 1 to get my things, and as I turned around the corridor, I saw the suspicious guy back at the nurses' table,
HIS HAND ON TOP OF MY BAG!!!

He stepped back when he saw me, and I hurriedly approached him, and with a loud voice asked what he was doing. He mumbled something incoherent, and then flipped through my documents, asking if a certain patient's papers were there. I felt my eyes grow big, and I instantly grabbed his left wrist and yelled, "Why are you touching my things!?!" He was taken aback, and he pulled back his arm, and started running towards the ramp. I ran after him, and screamed like mad, calling out our pharmacist's name. He stopped and turned around, and started requesting for me not to yell. He said he was in the hospital to visit a friend, and that he didn't do anything wrong. I asked him why he ran, and he retorted by saying that he freaked out when I grabbed his hand. I seized him by the wrist again, and told him that I was taking him to the Emergency Room.

By then a lot of people has gathered near the ER cos he was loudly protesting his innocence, while I was also shouting at him saying that I clearly saw his hands on top of my bag (though I was careful not to accuse him of anything). The guard took him to a chair just outside the ER entrance, and told him to calm down, telling him that if he was really innocent then he had nothing to worry about. The guy insisted that he was there to visit this certain patient, so we called down that patient's relative who confirmed that the suspicious guy was indeed their neighbor. By then I had already calmed down a bit and started to fret and feel guilty for putting the person in such an embarrassing situation. I went inside the ER, and realized that my hands were trembling. Our pharmacist approached me, and secretly told me that the patient's relative said that the guy was not trustworthy, so we were calling for police assistance. She was also going to check the CCTV to review the incident.

We probably detained the guy for almost 30minutes, cos the police took such a long time to arrive. By then I think the suspect realized that we called the authorities, and started to become agitated especially when the guard showed him a picture of a previous thief we caught on CCTV, who bore a striking similarity to his profile. Then at one point, the guard became distracted and busy attending to people coming in and out, and the suspect saw his chance. He rushed towards the main gate but was blocked by our ER nurse (who is a small, thin guy!). Realizing that he couldn't escape from there, he quickly rushed back towards the Nurse Station 1, towards the end of the hallway, and jumped out from the window (which was two-storeys high!). Our guard ran after him, but he was gone. The police arrived by then, but they were too late.

We assumed by then that he must have been guilty since he ran away. When we finally got to review the CCTV, he really did get something from the front compartment of my bag, which he immediately pocketed. He was about to go away, but he turned back cos he was aiming for the main compartment of my bag. That was when I caught him touching my bag, but he wasn't opening it so I couldn't accuse him of anything. Thinking back, I shouldn't have been so soft-hearted and should have immediately suspected him, cos a normal person won't go around touching other people's things. Anyway, we plan to file a case against him, cos we think he's the one who has been repeatedly stealing our nurses' cellphones. I rummaged through my bag and realized that I lost my 50-peso bill. Good thing I didn't have any valuables inside that bag, but the thought that a crook touched my things and that I actually caught him and even chased after him still freaks me out. Despite the fact that he escaped, I feel a sense of pride for what I did, but also know that it was a dangerous thing to do. A lot of people praised me for being so brave, but those same people also scolded me for being so stupid. Because of the adrenaline rush, it didn't cross my mind back then that he could have attacked me or even stabbed me or something. God was truly on my side at that time. Thank God none of us got hurt, and nothing valuable was lost.

I really hope he gets caught soon. The thought that he's just lurking around somewhere, waiting for his next chance, totally freaks me out. I pray that God will keep all of us, especially our staff and patients, safe from up-to-no-good people like him.

2011-01-21T01:06:00.002+08:00

GUILTY PLEASURE

"Fall in love with me. Love me ten times, twenty times as fiercely as you do now, until you can't bear to be away from me..."

I was supposed to post this last month, but this entry somehow got delayed. Well, recently I've been indulging on something that's atrocious, shameless and wicked... and before you read any further, let me just warn you that this entry might not appeal to the general public. So read at your own risk (I guess...) and let me tell you the story of...

How I've been whisked into the world of Boys Love.
I think it must have started sometime year 2002 when I got hold of Gravitation. This anime stirred quite a commotion in my old online community, and as I was a young and innocent otaku back then, this got me really curious to the point of finally procuring a copy. The art was definitely beautiful, the music awesome, the characters interesting and good-looking but... WTF was that elevator kissing scene between Yuki and Shuichi!?! *boku wa shock!* O___0

Yes! Boys Love (BL) is a genre in manga/anime that focuses on the budding relationship between (aherm!) two males. It's also referred to as Shounen Ai or Yaoi, depending on the explicity. I really don't know how to explain it so you can just look it up in Wikipedia.

Now while the Yuki x Shuichi kissing scenes in Gravitation totally knocked me off my chair, I did find their taboo romance appealing. Crazy as that may sound, but what is generally forbidden is enticing after all. XD Not that I approve of homosexuality in real life. But somehow watching these two characters, regardless of their gender, fall and grow in love just touches me. I don't know. I can't explain it myself either. Just that I can somehow tolerate watching or reading about it knowing that it is fiction, but I know that this just cannot, should not, must not happen for real.

Now while Gravitation was enjoyable, it wasn't enough to turn me into a BL fan. I don't think I want to be one either. ^^; But I must admit I've watched a fair share of BL animes which include titles such as the following:

Fake (OAV)
Angel's Feather (OAV)
Araiso Private High School Student Council Executive Committee (OAV)
Mirage of Blaze (OAV)
Maiden Rose (OAV)
Koutetsu Sangokushi (TV)
Gakuen Heaven (TV)
Princess Princess (TV)
Hetalia Axis Powers (TV)

If I may say so myself, most of these are actually pretty "wholesome" as they just showcase a bunch of pretty boys. I mean, who doesn't like ogling over a harem of bishounens!? (I know I do! O___O) But the BL mangas are another thing. I have read several random titles, most of which I just downloaded on impulse, and they are more ... "action-packed". And by action, I don't mean the Donnie Yen type of Ip Man action. It's uh... another kind of action not suitable for young audiences. =__=; I don't remember any of the manga titles though as I promptly delete them after reading (cos I get too overwhelmed with guilt!) and I eventually stopped as I became bored with all the monotony and recurring storylines and repetitive actions.

However, last month I went to meet my friend Yume, and she asked me if I wanted her to bring any anime. I don't know what got into me but I just blurted out: JUNJOU ROMANTICA! And so the DVD came to be and was delivered instantly into my open hands. I've watched 2 or 3 episodes of JR before in crunchyroll before the site started collecting membership fees. I thought the series was interesting but never really had the courage to download it. But I've heard great reviews (from BL fans XD) and so I immediately decided to give it a try. Lying in my dark room at midnight, watching it on my laptop with my earphones, I was too absorbed that I didn't notice that I've already finished 9 episodes and it was already 5:30am! I posted on Facebook the next day that I was at a loss for words, and Yume, probably feeling guilty, asked me if it was that bad and if I was just too shocked. This was what I posted:

YESSSSSSS ... IT REALLY WAS!!!! XD

Junjou Romantica is a 24-episode BL anime aired in 2008 and divided equally into two seasons. It focuses on three couples:

Junjou Romantica is the main arc which focuses on a college freshman named Takahashi Misaki, who through an (un)fortunate turn of events, went to live with the novelist Usami Akihiko. Now the latter is not only very moody, but also likes to pamper his (initially unwanted) affections on the young lad. Their relationship gradually develops throughout the anime as they struggle with their awakening emotions and the opposing people around them.

Junjou Egoist tells the story of Kamijo Hiroki, a short-tempered college professor who has long harbored unrequited feelings for Akihiko. By chance he meets Kusama Nowaki, a kind and caring younger man, who eventually became his lover. As the series progresses, time, distance and their social differences threaten to break their intimate bond.

Junjou Terrorist is the third and most minor of the storylines, and perhaps the most unusual(?). Yoh Miyagi is a divorced literature professor who suddenly finds Takatsuki Shinobu professing his love for him and claiming that they are destined for each other. But the thing is, Shinobu is still a high school student, and not to mention the son of Miyagi's boss and the brother of his ex-wife! The circumstances may be a little crazy, but may just be what Miyagi needs to move on from an event in his past.

First off, I'd say that one of the main strengths of this series is the animation. The art is really wonderful and eye-candy. The men are absolutely gorgeous, drawn with beautiful faces, broad shoulders, long legs and just oozing with masculinity (how ironic, huh!?). Plus factor is that they are also brought to life onscreen by amazing seiyuus, whose voice ranges are completely epic! I just love how Akihiko's uber-deep husky murmurs contrast perfectly with Misaki's squeaky brash cries. When I researched more on the voice actors, I learned that they were real pros who have done major parts for Bleach, Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist plus so many popular and mainstream animes. Another thing I really love in this anime is the music. Until now I just can't get over the two opening themes, Kimi=Hana and Shoudou (both sang by Pigstar) and they are still the current ringtones for my phones. And last but not the least, I must admit that I was totally captivated with the story of our three couples, which is a terrific mix of humor and drama. Though theirs may be a tale of forbidden romance, but their pure and strong emotions for the person they love just reaches into my heart and breaks every barrier of traditional notions I have on couples. I cannot help but to also feel and somehow sympathize with their pains and joys, losses and triumphs, denials and realizations as our three couples grow in their respective relationships. Action-wise, I can also say that their "couple scenes" and show of affections came out rather cute and "kilig", and not vulgar or sleazy or disturbing (unlike some other BL animes), so that was really quite a relief for me.

I did not expect to but I really enjoyed Akihiko x Misaki's constant bickering and Miyagi x Shinobu's unreasonable squabbles, but I must admit the main reason I'm completely hooked and sold to this anime is because of...

♥♥♥ HIROKI x NOWAKI!!! ♥♥♥

Although they only appeared in a total of five episodes, but I also cried in all of those five friggin' episodes. I really love how tsundere Hiroki acts all tough as if he doesn't care yet easily gets shy and flustered, and the way Nowaki seems like such a humble simpleton yet is so passionate and aggressive when fighting for his beloved. I love the fact that they are both insecure in their relationship, yet this is also the factor which moves them to hold on desperately to each other. I love how each individual is trying to excel and surpass the other, yet all they really need to understand is that they have already, in their hearts, accepted one another. I just cannot put into words how I love these two characters and how their love story has captured my heart completely! But I can only say that my JR fandom is blazing simply because of the burning flames of hot passion between Hiroki x Nowaki! I friggin' want so much more of them! >___<

Overall, I can say that JR was a satisfying and engaging anime experience for me, and despite that it's not the normal shoujo love story that I prefer, I definitely would want to gladly re-watch this anytime. ^o^

2011-01-19T22:45:00.001+08:00

ALL "CLEAR"!!!

I have been victimized again! X____X

Remember my story on how some of my old ~~pirated~~ DVDs suddenly became like clear round plastic materials and lost all data?

Well, it has found another victim in my stash and it's none other than...

MY COPY OF SAIUNKOKU MONOGATARI THAT I HAVEN'T WATCHED YET!

Look at what happened to it...

It's now all clear and you can actually see the cover through the underside!

WHAT A CHEAP FSCK*NG@#%!$^&7$@!# PIECE OF TRASH!!!! T______T
It's not anyone's fault though, and if I were to point my fingers at someone, I'd blame myself. For supporting piracy. For stashing unnecessary materialistic stuffs. For not taking the time to watch my DVDs. And just for being the obsessive-compulsive hoarder that I am. I know these are made of cheap, low-quality materials and don't expect much from them, but of all titles, why Saiunkoku Monogatari!? I haven't watched it yet, don't know where to download it, and don't know anyone who has a copy of it! :(

And so this makes me ponder on what should be the best way to store my video collection. I have started backing up some of my files in external hard disks, but I'm afraid that they might get infected by a virus and crash someday (very much like what happened to my sister's now-useless Ipod Classic) and I'll lose at least 500gb worth of videos. I've also burned most of my animes into DVDs but I also noted that a lot of these somehow have burn errors and can no longer be read by my computer, thereby making me lose at least 4gb worth of files. Collecting DVDs also mean that they will eventually accumulate space in my room, which is exactly what is happening right now, as I've amassed at least two huge boxes full of VHS/CDs/VCDs/DVDs (to my mother's chagrin XD). Well, another option is to burn several copies and give them away to friends as gifts/back-ups, which is what I sometimes do, but that kinda takes up my time and money. Last option is to simply STOP COLLECTING, which I have been contemplating lately. The truth is, I've realized that I have been spending much and piling up a lot of these things which are earthly, costly, and later on, pretty useless. Doesn't the Bible say,
"Don't store up treasures here on earth, where they can be eaten by moths and get rusty, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where they will never become moth-eaten or rusty and where they will be safe from thieves. Wherever your treasure is, there your heart and thoughts will also be." (Matthew 6:19-21, NLT)

Anyhoo, one of my 2011 Goals is to go on a Download Diet, which means I'm trying not to click-and-download pretty much everything that I see online. It's so difficult not to give in to the temptation but with my current state of workload and the difficult internet access in my workplace, I think I can somehow lie low a bit this year. Then hopefully I can focus on more important aspects of my life, like my spiritual growth and deciding the right direction for my career.

But still... WHY SAIUNKOKU MONOGATARI!?!?!? *cries*

2011-01-17T00:59:00.001+08:00

MY ANNUAL TEN-PESO PROJECT

I posted this pic in my Facebook wall but I originally planned to put it up here first:

Guess how many Php10 coins are there in this pic!?

Around 2006, I noticed that a friend has been saving her coins and thought that it was a good practice to emulate. So around 2008, after I started working, I also began saving these coins. Why Php10? Simply because I do not like it! Have you tried flipping a Php10 coin? It makes such a fake plastic sound so I decided that I do not like it, so I won't spend it, and save it up instead. Ever since, I almost never spend Php10 coins. I got so used to not spending PhpP10 that everytime I see someone use it, my heart kinda breaks. That's just how weird I really am. XD

So for mid-2008 to end of 2009, I saved up to 500 of these coins (so that's about Php5000) and that went in the bank. And for 2010's collection (which is shown in the pic above), I counted 357 of these coins. But when I went to the bank they refused to accept one of the coins cos it was badly damaged, so I ended up with a total of 356 coins, or Php3560. Not bad huh? I was aiming for at least 500 coins/year, but somehow didn't reach my goal. Hopefully I'll reach that mark this 2011. ^____^

2011-01-16T23:34:00.000+08:00

PLANNING AHEAD

I recently said GOODBYE to my 2010 planner...

...and said HELLO to my new 2011 planner...

...both given by my most wonderful boyfriend who got coffee-drunk completing all those Starbucks stickers.♥♥♥

The 2010 planner really proved to be so useful to me, and it was well used and abused as I've filled up the pages with my random scribblings, schedules, plans, lists, budgets, and just about anything else that I could possibly think of. I just love making lists and taking random notes!

I also plan to do the same for my new planner, except that I still haven't had much time to write on it. It's been quite a crazy week at work, what's with the gadzillions of patients rushing in daily to be examined and admitted. Not to mention that the new wing of our hospital will soon open and we will be adding about 40 more beds plus an Intensive Care Unit to our workload. Lately, we've really noticed the rapid expansion and growth of our hospital, and I just don't know how to cope with all these stressful changes (resign, maybe? XD). Like, it's been more than a week since I got here, but I only got to open my laptop tonight. I was initially planning to play Egg Breaker in Facebook everyday, but never got the chance to do so until tonight (and saw that I friggin' lost all of my bonus hammers! :c).

Well anyway, I initially planned to blog about my 2011 goals but actually realized that I really didn't prepare for it. The list will more or less look like 2009's LIST anyway:

Moisturize daily.
Clean room.
Draw more.
Blog often.
Study.
Lose weight.
Save money.
Download diet.
Mature in my Christian faith.

Plus in addition I plan to finish the Bible in a year (thanks to our bible guide), finish our A-Z drawing challenge, finish my stacks of books/mangas, finish my animes/dramas (or most of it anyway), and just generally learn and accomplish a lot of stuffs. And, God willing, know where my life's headed for -- since it's pretty much as messed up as this blog entry. >___<

May 2011 be a great year for all of us. And yah, I know: the key word is DISCIPLINE.

2011-01-08T05:56:00.000+08:00

I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND

When they told me that Vic Zhou was coming over to our church, I thought it was the craziest joke ever made...

... until they introduced me to him. O____O

I swear, I almost died on the spot. They told me he was here in the Philippines to promote his upcoming movie, his first break into Hollywood, where he portrays the role of comic book superhero The Flash. [THINK VIC ZHOU IN FRIGGIN' RED TIGHTS! *nosebleeds*] But since it was a Sunday, he had the day off and he was invited by our senior pastor to our service. His identity and presence were being kept a secret from the public though. And since none of the church members were interested on babysitting him, and so they said they'll just leave him in my capable hands.

WHHHHAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTT!!!????

I shot a quick look at him: He was lying on the couch, staring at me, eyes sparkling and with a mischievous smile. Clearly, he was FLIRTING WITH ME! XD I was flabbergasted but I tried to maintain my composure. Beside me, another guy who we will forever know as he-who-must-never-be-named-here was pestering me and professing his undying love for me while trying to wrap me in his huge arms. I pushed him off forcefully and told him to go away cos I was no longer interested in him and that I already have someone else in my heart. Then I slowly approached Vic.

I don't know how it happened but we just ... connected. Even though it was the first time we've met in person, but I felt as if I was being reunited with an old friend. We bantered and laughed and spoke about various stuffs, and he was just so easy and comfortable to talk with. I couldn't even recall if we spoke in Mandarin or in English - I didn't really care - cos we just understood each other. And it just felt right being with him.

He suddenly stood up, covered his face with his jacket's hood, then flashed me a boyish grin. I felt my heart skip a beat as I realized what he planning to do. He then took my hand in his (it felt so warm and soft ♥), and then we ran. We dashed down the church halls, we sprinted out the door and felt the gush of wind in our faces, and we just ran and ran and ran as if we were crazy. Then we stopped to catch our breaths, and then we laughed like mad at what we just did. And all this time, he was holding my hand. And it didn't seem like he was letting go. >_<

We went inside a mall and it was teeming with lots of people. I felt his tense grip as he nervously glanced around. His handsome face was well hidden under his hood, but somehow he still stood out. I gently nudged him and gave him what I thought was my "reassuring smile". I was generously rewarded as he beamed with delight at me. And then we slowly walked down the stairs. He was still holding my hand.

We met the wife of one of our pastors in the stairway, and I felt obliged to introduce Vic to her as he was a church guest after all. She recognized him, and told me that our senior pastor already told her about him. And then she went her way, and we proceeded to go down the next floor.

There was a huge crowd of people gathered around the mall's atrium, and some more curious spectators were also rushing towards the excitement. I tried to see what all the hustle-bustle was but I couldn't see a thing. Vic wanted to enter this elevated area which had a good view of the atrium, but there were guards watching that place. Then I heard a familar voice sing in Cantonese...

"It's Andy Lau...," says Vic, holding my hand tightly.

"Yes I know! But I can't see..." I tried standing on tiptoes but all I could visualize were more people. "And I don't understand Cantonese..."

"Leng, it's almost 8... and you need to do a lot of things today..."

"HUH!?" I turned to look at Vic... but my vision was getting blurry...

"Leng, hurry up... WAKE UP!!!"

"HUH!?" I blinked a few times, then opened my eyes...

... and saw my mother. In my room. No Vic holding my hand...

Arghhhhhh!!!! It was another fsck*ng dream! @#$%^$Kl@*&#$T%#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I always seem to have weird dreams, but this one definitely goes down the annals of my "celebrity specials" along with prior fantasies about Jerry Yan and Kimura Takuya. XD And while writing this entry, I remember one of Vic's old series, Poor Prince Taro, which, if I'm not mistaken was his project after Meteor Garden. The opening song was a rendition of "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" by Dragon5.

The above video is a clip of their outtakes, but just go check out the opening song which is a fitting theme song to my dream. Hehe~ Gosh, this series was like almost ten years ago!!! Look at how "totoy" Vic still looked like back then! But he's already really quite adorable though. ^o^

Well if it's any consolation for me (and for you) who will never get to hold Vic's hand in real life...

... let's just let him sing for us... ^_________^

2011-01-01T21:59:00.000+08:00

THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR

I was blessed when the cashier at National Bookstore SM gave me this. She asked me what my faith was, and when I told her I was a Christian, she encouraged me to get more of these pamphlets to give to my friends. This is a one year Bible-reading guide. My boyfriend and I failed at reading the Bible last year, and as part of our "vow of discipline" for 2011, we aim to finish it this time around. We didn't know how to go about it, but thank God for this guide which He timely brought to my hands. Now we have no excuse not to finish the Bible this year! I'm so excited. :)

It was just supposed to be something we planned to do as a couple, but God impressed upon me that I need to share this little blessing I have, cos I know it can and will become something very big that will move the hearts of many. I didn't know how else to share this except to give copies of the pamphlet to my friends. But this morning when I woke up, I felt that somehow God whispered the words into my ears and told me to upload it in Facebook. I think it can reach more people that way. I hope and pray that it will.

So I posted this in Facebook, and I'm posting it here again in my blog with the hopes that more and more people will be able to see this, and like me, aim to read the entire Bible this year. I also pray that this will develop in us the attitude for daily devotions and improve our relationship with and knowledge of our Father. Let's start the new year right with God as our main focus, and let us always keep Him as Master and Keeper of our lives.

(12 large images up ahead so I'd better insert a jump break here)

2011-01-01T00:04:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 2011!!!

May this new year be as blessed as the past year, and may many more of our dreams come true.

God bless all of us this 2011! ^___^

2010-12-25T23:49:00.003+08:00

MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS 2010!

Traveling by bus from my workplace to my house takes more than two hours. I was a bit worried yesterday cos I was not too sure if I could get a ride since almost all of the buses were full as almost everyone's just rushing to get home for the holidays. Good thing a friend of mine was driving back to CDO so I got to hitch and was home by 6pm.

My sister also arrived the day before from Cebu so I was really excited and happy cos my family's complete. My aunt (Ah-e) also came, and we had a simple dinner. Gift-giving is not our tradition but my sister and I surprised our parents by preparing some presents for them. My Papa got a shirt from me and a sling bag from my sis; Mama got pajamas from me and flipflops from my sis; and I got a huge and absolutely adorable panda pillow from my sis and she got pajamas (pink with panda prints!) from me. We also unwrapped the gifts sent by my boyfriend♥ -- Christmas mugs + Cocoa for my family and a "gravity-defying" book for me. Then we took crazy pictures of ourselves in our cramped apartment. It was so much fun! The rest of the night was spent watching TV and facebook-ing. XD My parents went to sleep early but my sis and I were still up to see the fireworks set by the neighbors. They were really pretty~

I got the flu so most of Christmas eve and Christmas day were spent sleeping. (I know, I'm THAT boring! XD) Been sick the past 3 days -- always feeling feverish, with very bad colds, a developing cough and I also lost my voice! But I've been holding it in cos I just couldn't leave my work in the hospital yet. It's really ironic how I can devote all my time to treating patients yet don't have the time to treat myself. That's what they probably mean by vocation. Anyway, last night I've started drinking a whole bunch of medicines (many thanks to my supply of samples) so I hope I get well real soon.

This season, I'm just so much thankful for all the greetings and warm wishes, for the material and immaterial gifts, and for my family and the special memories we made. But most importantly, let us never forget and forever be grateful for the true meaning of CHRISTmas, and that is the celebration of how great our Awesome God loves us, so great that He came down to become human like us, and die on the cross for our every sin so that we may be saved. Let us always be reminded of this love and let us give back our adoration to our God and share this blessing to all the people around us. May the spirit of CHRISTmas be always in our hearts, not just today but every single day of our lives.

2010-12-20T19:49:00.003+08:00

A DATE WITH TWO FRIENDS + CIRCUS CHARLIE (watch out for the blue monkey!)

I have a co-resident in the hospital named Lousyl whom I've worked with since late 2009. She's just about a year younger than me, and two batches lower than me in med school, but I didn't know her at all until we got to work together. At first I thought she was the outgoing egotistical type, but later realized that she's really just a sweet and simple girl who has a big heart for God and her family. We have a lot of interests in common so we became good friends.

Last Saturday, we had the opportunity to go out on a "date". The original plan was just her and me, but I brought along my friend Gervie cos I wanted them to be friends too. They got along real fine. ^o^ We met at Limketkai Mall, had a hearty lunch at Bigby's then went to SM to watch a movie. We were supposed to watch The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader in 3D but only Tron was available in 3D and we didn't want to watch it. So we settled in for the "normal" Narnia movie. Gervie already saw the film (in 3D!) so he didn't go with us anymore. I've also watched it, but didn't mind watching it again. After the movie, we met up with Gervie at National Bookstore and saw several books on sale, so we started hoarding again. The three of us just love books!

It was around 6pm already by this time, and I knew Lousyl had to leave by 7pm cos she lives somewhere in Bukidnon, and has to take an almost 2-hour bus ride to get home. But then my family called me up and said that they were also in the mall. Grabbing the opportunity, I decided to treat them all - my parents, my 2 aunts and my 2 friends - for dinner. Lousyl agreed to go home a bit later than planned, and so we went back to Limketkai to eat at MOOON Cafe.

Say Cheese!
(Somehow I feel like a third wheel here... and what's with my messy hair! XD)

After dinner, my mom, 2 aunts and I wanted to make a quick stop at a stall in the second floor of Robinson's, so we hurried up their escalator which was this flat type thing (imagine an escalator without steps similar to those in airports). I noticed that the handrail on the right side was not moving and had several "NONFUNCTIONAL" signs pasted on it. I turned to warn my mom and aunts against holding on that defective rail, but was too late as I saw one of my aunts make this sort of backflip then fell flat on her butt. She couldn't find her balance and was still holding on to the non-moving rail despite me yelling at her to let go of it. In desperation, my other aunt went to help her stand, but (alas!) she too held on to the broken rail! And she fell forward and sort of sprawled on my aunt#1 and then did a sort of strange roll over while one of her slippers flew up the air! Both of them could no longer stand and I panicked cos I thought maybe their clothes got stuck in the escalator or something so I hurried towards them but realized in frustration that I was not going anywhere near them since we were still moving upward. All of these weirdness happened in just a few seconds but at that time it really felt like such a long time. Our commotion caught the attention of several bystanders, and these two muscular guys from the ground floor rushed to help my poor aunts up. A saleslady from a food stall also ran up in panic response (and abandoned her stall! XD) We were so grateful for all their help! When we reached the second floor, we just couldn't help but laugh and feel embarrassed over what happened! And guess what aunt#1 had the guts to say after all that?!:
"Why didn't you take a picture of us while we were still sprawled down there!?"
0____o

My two aunties totally did crazy stunts in Robinson's escalator reminiscent of Circus Charlie!!! XD

Lousyl had to leave already so Gervie drove her to the bus terminal. My family and I then went to the newly-opened Starbucks to complete those friggin' stickers. It was our first time to go there, yet we were dismayed cos we couldn't find any seats! I somehow have the impression that majority of the people there were posers and were just there for show, and that kinda irked me cos we were customers who wanted to drink good coffee! After waiting for like 15 minutes, the mall started shooting fireworks and so the seated customers ran to watch the display, and we immediately ran to grab their seats (sneaky~ ^o^). I ordered their hot Christmas Peppermint Mocha coffee and for the first time in my life appreciated how delicious Starbucks coffee really is. Service was a bit slow though as all the baristas had their hands full ~~serving all those posers~~. Gervie came back in a while, and he pointed to me several members from CDOtaku (Yume, Hanya, Aylarox Kumicho, Kookee etc etc etc) who just arrived as well. I also met Ninez, a college classmate. We said our quick HELLOs and our GOODBYEs since it was already so late. Gervie (who became our official driver of the day) then took me and my family home.

After such a long day, it was no wonder that we just simply crashed on our beds. Our bodies were all tired but we were grateful for the fun and the memories.

2010-12-17T20:58:00.058+08:00

SANTA CAME EARLY

Been quite busy the past few days cos my mother's sister (aka my aunt, aka Be-i) arrived from Cebu two days ago. Among my many maternal relatives, Be-i is perhaps the closest to our family, since she used to live with us when she was still single. She was also the one who taught me my ABCs and 123s during my early years. But nowadays, she's just too busy with her family and work in Cebu, so having her over for a visit is always a delight and a treat for us and for her cos we get to bond and she also gets some much needed rest.

Since my mom has work so I was tasked to take her around. Yesterday we went to the Office of the Civil Registrar to do some important paperworks, to the mall to buy some random stuffs and groceries, and then had dinner at Cafe Laguna to celebrate her birthday, as well as the birthday of my other aunt, Ah-e. Today we went to several chinese wholesale stores to buy random stuffs, including a maneki neko, then went to SM to meet Ah-e again and buy more random stuffs (groceries again!). From these two days, I was able to point out TWO traits which Be-i and I distinctly share.

1. We are both impulsive, and
2. We are both hoarders! XD

YESH! I think I've just met my match! (And I am NO match for her! T___T) When I bought books, she also bought more books + magazines + random stuffs (even though she hardly reads!). When I bought cutie notepads, she bought twice as many of them + more random stuffs (even though she prolly won't use them!). She just loves buying things which she labels are "gift items" and also things which she labels as "useful items". And one of the highlights of her visits here is shopping for groceries. It's like being given a pushcart where you can just put absolutely anything! I actually feel embarrassed when she buys so many stuffs for us, yet Be-i is the type of person who doesn't mind and whose generosity just simply overflows. It's like having Santa over so much earlier for Christmas. ^______^

Thank you Be-i, and (belated) Happy Birthday!

2010-12-14T17:02:00.000+08:00

CHRISTMAS BANNER

Got myself a new Christmas banner. Or should I say, STAMP!? hehehe...

It's still Sawako and Kazehaya from KimiTodo. Too lazy to change lay-out and still loving this manga/anime. I heard the second season will start airing this January. *keeps fingers crossed* I still have yet to watch the live-action movie. I don't think it's available yet.

I'm actually quite fond of this black and white blog design cos it's clean and does not strain the eyes, so I think I'll keep it this way for now. I'm not good with HTML codes at all so the best I can do is change the banner every now and then with some random favorite images. But I'm also not good with Photoshop etc as all my images are simply edited with MS Paint (loser me~ XD).

Well, let's say good bye to version 8.0: Ephemerality and say hello to version 8.5: Snow-Capped Dreams! ^____^

2010-12-13T23:24:00.008+08:00

I've always wanted to buy a pair of Chucks but just never really made it a priority...

... Until THIS!

Oh what joy! :)

A few months ago when I was in Manila, I found this...

... but they were for kids only! :(

I've always been a fan of Dr Seuss's works. And to see well-loved characters on a pair of good shoes really tickles my fancy.
I WANT ONE!!! I REALLY REALLY REALLY DO!!!
But I have BIG feet so there's absolutely no way I can fit into them. :(

And then my sister tells me there's more of them...

... and there are adult sizes! ^____^♥

I immediately went to the local Converse shop and they had some Seuss-themed Hi Tops,but this was the only Low Top they had in stock:

Although I'm not familiar with If I Ran The Zoo, but I like this cos it's dark and not too conspicuous.

And browsing online, I also found THESE!!!

I don't know if all of these come in adult sizes and if they are available locally,BUT I WANT THEM ALL SO BAD!!! =___=

Now if there are only Chucks designed with my most favorite Seuss book then it will really be so so so much wonderful!!!

I don't care if you believe it.That's the kind of house I live in.
And I hope we never leave it.

2010-12-12T21:32:00.023+08:00

NOT JUST ANOTHER SUNDAY

"We have nothing if not belief..." - Reepicheep

This morning, I went with Gervie to Inside Out, which is the youth service of Golden City Alliance Fellowship. It was my first time to attend their service, although I have always been interested since our friend Glen also goes there (though she was absent today). It was a refreshing change to be in such a youth-packed group, and I was also blessed by today's message on The Parable of the Lost Sons. I have, once again, realized my sinfulness and my lack of faith, yet I am, once again, reminded of how great and amazing our God is, how easily He forgives us, and how much He so freely showers us with His love! Praise GOD!

After the service, we went back home to fetch my parents and then had a sumptuous lunch at Bigby's. We didn't really have any definite plans so we just walked around Limketkai Mall. Later, Gervie and I saw A LOT of books on sale at National Bookstore, so we freaked out and splurged. I bought Michael Crichton's Pirate Latitudes (Php75), William Golding's Lord of the Flies (PhP50), and Gregory Maguire's Son of a Witch (Php30! WTF!?!!). Gervie also bought a whole stack of books, including the Hitchhiker's Guide to Galaxy volumes 2-5, which I'll just borrow later on. My parents and I decided to watch a movie at Gaisano, so we parted with Gervie from there.

We watched The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. This is undeniably my most favorite book in the series, and although it's a very inaccurate adaptation but it's also perhaps my most favorite Narnia movie so far. I love how magical and adventure-packed this film is, and I am pleased with how Edmund and Lucy has grown up so beautifully. And oh my, Prince Caspian!♥ ... were you always this ~~gorgeously hot and delicious~~ (ahem!) good looking!? XD I enjoyed Reepicheep's antics, he's always been so lovable! We also have our new kid Eustace Scrubb, whom at first I really didn't like and thought was not fit for the role. But later on I find myself liking him in the same way that his character in the book grew on me. He is actually my most favorite character in the book, and the movie version was quite likeable as well. So I think I will look forward to seeing him reprise his role in the next movie, which I think they were hinting when they mentioned Jill Pole's name in the end.

My most favorite quote in the movie was what Aslan told Lucy when they were facing the mirror. I had it memorized but now I forgot. XD But it was about valuing yourself and being beautiful just by who you are. The above picture is my most favorite scene: As Aslan approached, I had the impression that the dragon tried to back off a bit and hide its face. And then we just simply see him physically breaking down. This brought me to tears, as I imagined that it would probably be a similar reaction when we will face our God. We will surely fall on our knees and try to hide ourselves, because no matter who we are in this earth, we are just not worthy of His glorious presence. And yet, without a word, His love will just simply break down our sinfulness. GOD IS INDEED SO AMAZING!!! ^___^

After the movie, my parents and I had an eat-all-you-can dinner before heading home. It had been a long day, but it was rather fulfilling and I felt really blessed.

2010-12-11T21:38:00.003+08:00

U-TURN

"Even if I come to know everything because my memory comes back,
I'd still... like to come over and play sometimes."

I do a lot of mindless right click-download on random torrent files, and one of my chance downloads is 2008's U-Turn, which is a korean mini-drama/car advertisement/music video starring So Ji Sub and Lee Yeon Hee. Ji Sub's a recording producer/personnel here, and one night, he discovers a strange girl in his car's trunk. He then tries to help the girl find out who she is. It's only 4 episodes, and each is just about 5 minutes long only, so I finished watching it right away. It's quite a simple story, though a bit clichéd (and freaky? XD). But I also thought it was satisfying, artfully done, and with great music to boot.

This is Ji Sub's comeback "drama" after his military service. The first time I saw him was on Glass Shoes, where my Mom and I cried and bawled over a tragic family tale which lasted for 40 episodes! Then I saw him in the psycho-tale, Memories in Bali. I gradually learned to develop a liking for him and his incredible acting, and although he is really TOO chinky but I think it adds to his charm. After watching U-Turn, I remembered that I still have yet to watch more of Ji Sub's series. No, I won't download anymore, but will need to hunt for Thousand Years of Love, I'm Sorry I Love You (I thought I have this but I actually don't!) and watch my copy of Cain and Abel SOON.

2010-12-07T22:31:00.006+08:00

MATSUMOTO JUN IS A DIRECTOR!?!

About a week ago, I was browsing some random blog when I chanced upon the writer's entry on the anime, Senkou no Night Raid. She said that it was being directed by Matsumoto Jun. I went totally berserk! WTF!?! He's not only a freakin' F4/Arashi boy but also an anime director!? I was so impressed that I just had to tell my boyfriend. He was skeptical about it, but he believes just about anything I say. ♥ ♥ ♥

Well tonight, I was browsing through ANN when I caught MatsuJun's name again. Curious, I clicked on his link and came across a whole bunch of animes that were credited under him...

Digimon... Ghost In The Shell... Persona...

WAIT A FRIGGIN' MINUTE!? THAT'S A DIFFERENT MATSUMOTO JUN!?!!!! XD

Well, that's just so typical of me to not think at all and simply jump into crazy conclusions. ^_______^

P.S.
Well, since I brought up the topic of MatsuJun then I'll just say something about him (the REAL Arashi/F4 MatsuJun!!! XD). Apparently he did a drama with Takeuchi Yuko this year entitled Natsu no Koi wa Nijiiro ni Kagayaku, which translates to Summer Romance Shines in Rainbow Color. I am so excited about this 10-episode romantic comedy that if I had a better internet connection now, I'd immediately download this instantly right away! (notice the redundancy and the extravagant use of adverbs.. that's just how excited I am! XD) They even received several awards for this drama. I'm definitely putting this on top of my (very long) queue list! :)

2010-12-03T23:20:00.007+08:00

TOO MUCH CHEESE! XD

"Ang true love ay para sa matatapang na tao lamang."

I went to the movies yesterday to watch HP, and went back again today to watch My Amnesia Girl ^o^ . Now I'm no fan of John Lloyd or Toni, didn't even know they were having a movie, and have not seen the trailer at all. I only learned about it cos my boyfriend told me (but he hasn't seen it though), and I also read about it in Chi's blog so that kinda got me curious. I don't really watch local films regularly since they just don't interest me that much. The last time I actually went to watch one in the cinema was already more than a year ago. But last month I saw Paano Na Kaya (and Kim Chiu's epic Bogs, Shinota mo ako!), Anne and Sam's Babe I Love You, and the star-studded Here Comes The Bride which I found very hilarious. But I don't know why I felt compelled to watch My Amnesia Girl today, and even brought my mother along. She also has no idea what the movie is all about. XD

Well one thing I'm sure of though is that I'm obviously in for a romantic comedy. John Lloyd is Apollo while Toni is Irene, the sweet and loving perfect couple (with an extra large serving of cheese and corn). But at one point something went wrong with their relationship and the next time they meet, Irene doesn't recognize Apollo at all and quickly explains that she was in an accident and had amnesia. And so begins a crazy tale of love, forgiveness and second chances (with an extra large serving of cheese and corn).

Yes, this movie is indeed too cheesy and too corny! XD Not that I mean that in a bad way. Based from real life experience, I can only say that when you're in love, being cheesy and corny really comes naturally. Trust me in this, cos my boyfriend is the epitome of cheese and corn (and that's why I love him so much! *hearts* ^0^). One of the main highlights of this film are these sappy pick-up lines which Apollo and Irene keep saying to each other. I just couldn't help but roll my eyes at lines such as:

"Ice ka ba? Gusto kasi kitang i-crush."

“Ulan ka ba? Kasi lupa ako. Sa ayaw at sa gusto mo, sa akin ang bagsak mo.”

“Kung ikakasal ka saan mo gusto? Ako kasi sa tabi mo.”

And there's gadzillions of those in this flick! LOL This film also has a simple but unusual plot, a refreshing change from all the typical melodramatic Philippine stories. And although I think there may be some parts which were quite impossible and unrealistic, but I like the core messages of fighting for that second chance, seeking for redemption, moving on from the hurts of the past and holding on to that one true love. This film somehow just wraps in all of these themes nicely, and I also couldn't help but break down in tears. (I easily cry in majority of films which is really weird.) In addition, John Lloyd was pretty funny here. Plus he was backed up by a wacky set of best buds who also gave me the laughs. His solid bunch of loud and overly supportive female and non-female fans inside the movie house also contributed to this enjoyable experience.

Oh, and one more thing. I do know someone named Apollo in real life, so that's really just kinda freakin' weird. 0____0

2010-12-02T23:55:00.017+08:00

NOWHERE IS SAFE, HARRY

I went to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 1 today. It's been so long since I've watched the 6th movie and even much longer since I've read the book! I felt kinda stupid sitting so tense and agitated there in the cinema cos I could only vaguely remember the events that would come next. I love the Harry Potter franchise, but I don't have the books. And I think to fully attach yourself to this wonderful magical tale that J.K. Rowling has created, you need to read and re-read the books. There's just too much substance within it that a single read would not suffice to absorb all of its goodness. No matter how a lot of people protest and beg to disagree, I really think that the Harry Potter series is awesome literature that will definitely go down in reading history much like The Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia.

I'll keep this entry short since I really don't want to go into a recap and I also don't want to spoil. But most of this film focuses on our three teenage protagonists -- Harry, Ron and Hermione -- and their travels to find the horcruxes. As usual I marvel at how pretty Emma Watson has grown and just how perfect she is as Hermione Granger, but was sad that Helena Bonham Carter and Alan Rickman didn't get much airtime as Bellatrix Lestrange and Severus Snape, respectively. As previously mentioned, these are three of my most favorite characters in the HP movie franchise. I was also impressed with the graphics they made for the story of the deathly hallows. Overall, I immensely enjoyed the film, laughed at some funny scenes and lines, and couldn't help but shed a tear for our brave and heroic Dobby. The movie was long (almost 3 hours) and ended with a Voldemort scene. (BTW, I love Ralph Fiennes as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named too cos he makes the Dark Lord so deliciously HOT! ^0^) Even though I knew this was only the first part, but I still couldn't help but cuss as I realized that I have to wait until July 2011 for the second half.

7 months is like so freakin' long, but then it would also mean that the Harry Potter movies will now come to its inevitable end. Oh the irony of it! It's like eagerly awaiting for the day which you do not want to arrive.

2010-12-02T11:56:00.005+08:00

COTTON IN MY MOUTH

"Mas maayu pa ang sakit sa pagbulag sa uyab kaysa magsakit ang ngipon..."

That would roughly translate to "It's better to suffer from the pain of breaking up with your boyfriend/girlfriend than to suffer from tooth pain!" Our pharmacist was the one who jokingly told me that, but I really believe that is oh so true!

I've always had problems with my teeth. I think it's because I never gave them much importance. When I was a kid, almost all my milk teeth were black with cavities so you can't find a single picture of me with a toothy smile. And although I eventually grew even, white permanent teeth, I also had frequent episodes of excruciating toothaches during med school. I've already had several of them extracted because of the pain until I realized that I might lose all of my teeth if I don't take care of them. So early this year I went to my dentist to have dental fillings. It took him two afternoons since he found around 16 cavities! And when I was still working in Camiguin, our hospital dentist made me dentures which I've been using for more than 6 months now. Since then, I have been brushing and using mouthwash religiously so I thought I am now free from teeth problems but I was wrong.

I have an impacted wisdom tooth (third molar) on the lower left side but the dentist said it was OK not to pull it out as long as it doesn't get infected. But a few months ago, the tooth just broke and then the molar beside it started developing a huge cavity. Since I was in Manila the previous months I never got the chance to have it fixed. And then when I got back here, it started aching almost every night. I've taken antibiotics and various pain relievers which gave temporary relief but the pain almost recurred every night.

Two nights ago I was on 24-hour duty when my teeth started aching again. My head felt like it was cracking and I was also starting to feel feverish. I started taking pain meds one after another but still the pain didn't go away. It was a horrible sensation and before I knew it, I already took THREE tablets of AL*****, TWO tablets of TR****, TWO tablets of BIOGESIC, and ONE tablet of DOLFENAL -- all within a span of FIVE HOURS! I think I might have overdone it with the TR******. Until now I still feel kinda deaf and woozy. @__@

So this morning I finally went to see my dentist who, by the way, has been elected as next year's PDA President for CDO (Congrats Doc! ^___^). He found three damaged teeth -- the said broken impacted third molar, the second molar beside it, and another upper molar. However he only took out the second molar because he still needs me to get an XRay for the two other teeth. So hopefully I won't experience any pain until I see my dentist again next week.

2010-11-23T23:27:00.000+08:00

LOSING MY MIND

I blame today's blog title on Ate Yeyen who just showed me a link of Lee Seung Gi's HOPE concert! I can't think straight right now because of His Adorable Highness shooting "love bullets" at me. ^_______^ *hearts*

But anyway, that's really not the point of this blog entry right now. I think perhaps I am still having an aftereffect of My Girlfriend is a Gumiho + Koukou Debut because I had a major major crazy realization tonight! And before I start to rationalize and become lazy and put these thoughts away, I think I should just lose my mind and write about this. And then maybe I can finally get some decent and "dreamless" sleep afterwards.

A few months ago, I learned that one of my high school classmates was getting married. Now while that may not really strike as something out of the ordinary (cos everyone seems to be getting married nowadays), but this one was somewhat perturbing for me. You see, he used to be someone close to me, what Miho the Gumiho would call as a be-pu, but some complicated things happened and we ended up just not talking anymore. I'm not even sure if we're friends. I am quite sure though that I once threw away and burned his things in anger, that I once cried for him until I vowed to never shed tears for him again, that I once forced amnesia on myself to forget him, and that I once hated him for almost three years until God convicted me and told me it's wrong to hate (and maybe I somewhat matured and realized how silly I was). But we never really became friends again. Which was weird. Cos we were only like 18 in our batch, and everyone is a very good friend to me. Everyone but him.

So hearing about him getting married felt kinda awkward, but surprisingly, I was genuinely happy for him (not that I would actually say that to him). But what also surprised me, and perplexed me, was that I started having weird dreams afterwards (like this one). I don't have any reason to think about him, so I also have no reason to dream about him. But I guess hearing that news somewhat jumbled up my subconsciousness, and he started appearing in my dreams. Not often, but just at some random occasions. But it would always make me very annoyed and confused when I wake up.

And then two weeks ago, my friends called me up and told me that we were meeting him and his wife for dinner. I initially didn't plan on going cos I had work and didn't really feel like going. But I was curious. I also didn't want to lie and run away because I had no reason to. But the thought of going really agitated me. Well to make the long story short, I took the bus home late that night and, although I missed dinner, I was able to join them for gelato at Missy Bon Bon. His wife is pretty and even though I hardly spoke to her (I don't think I spoke to her at all >__<), I immediately liked her cos she seems like such a nice and friendly person. We all went home an hour after I arrived. I felt kinda disappointed afterwards. I really didn't know what to expect and I also didn't expect to expect anything given that situation, but it wasn't really the get together that I expected.

Close friends often tell me that I'm dense and that I tend to have delayed reactions. And I guess these are one of those times. Tonight I traveled back home again by bus (but I'm going back to work again early morning tomorrow). I was listening to flumpool (super great band!) and sleeping, which is what I usually do while riding the bus so I don't get dizzy and nauseous. Then after about an hour inside the bus, I jerked and woke up. And maybe because of the similarity of my bus ride home two weeks ago, or perhaps that I was wearing the same jacket, but all at once these heap and jumble of old memories just came flooding into my mind, all of which were related to him! Everything just flashed before me -- how we became be-pu in 2nd year, how we stopped talking in 3rd year, how he patched things up and we started talking again in 4th year, how things went well in summer, and then went bad in college... Suddenly, I started to recall some stuffs which I thought I had already forgotten, and remembered various emotions which I thought I've already let go. And without warning, in that dimly lit bus, I started to cry silently.

As much as I want to stomp and crush and kick and set fire and bury and spit on those recollections of the past, I now realize that I just can't erase them. No matter how good or how terrible they were, they helped shaped me into who I am today. That major phase of my life made me the bitter or better person I am right now, and I believe what happened just had to happen because it was NECESSARY. I do not deny the fact that if not for him and what happened back then, I probably wouldn't have chosen to be a doctor right now. If not for him and what happened back then, I probably wouldn't have run into Japanese anime for comfort and distraction. If not for him and what happened back then, I probably would not have known how to love myself more and to establish my own identity before involving myself in a relationship. I would have gladly preferred not to have gone through all those affliction and misery to learn all of these lessons, but I guess this was what God gave me to deal with, and to struggle with, and to be transformed with into who I am now. Maybe I didn't see it before, but now I know and I believe that it was a NECESSARY kind of pain.

And as I really started to think about the situation and not just about myself, I began to realize that maybe I wasn't the only one who was in pain back then. Maybe he was too. I suddenly isolated myself and refused to talk to him, without bothering to explain what went wrong. Of course I must have caused him pain! I must have made him confused, and if he really did care, then I must have also made him miserable as well. Did I hurt his pride or provoked him to anger? Did he also agonize in despair or wallowed in bitterness? Did he hate me as well?

Does he still hate me now? x__X

(I really can't imagine being hated since I believe I'm quite a lovable person. And he's probably not the type to hate. I really don't know... Maybe he just didn't really care about what happened and I'm just thinking too much?)

But whatever his thoughts are, I guess now I somehow understand my own thoughts. What really agitated me for more than ten years, for the past few months, since last two weeks is probably the fact that I lost a friend. And not just any random acquaintance, but someone who was once like a brother, and a best friend to me. And I am partly to blame for this. And yes, I did have expectations and that's why I went to meet them two weeks ago. I was hoping that I could talk to him, and sincerely wish him happiness. But it wasn't the proper situation and the right time to bring up all these. After all of the long years and with the different directions of our lives, I don't know if we will ever have the chance to talk about what happened. I don't even know if he wants to talk about it, or if he just doesn't care at all. Maybe it won't be fixed anymore. Perhaps there is nothing left that can be fixed anymore.

I do not know if there will ever be an opportunity. But maybe someday I can find the courage to face him and ask him to forgive me.
And maybe by then, I hope, I can also find the courage to forgive myself.

2010-11-21T21:10:00.004+08:00

IN LOVE WITH YOH!

As part of my determined attempt to finish all of my so-called backlogs, I saved a bunch of manga scans in my PSP and brought them to work. One of the titles is Koukou Debut (aka High School Debut), which is a 13-volume manga by Kawahara Kazune published in 2003-2008. It tells the story of a high school freshman named Nagashima Haruna who has decided to fall in love in high school and get herself a boyfriend. However, Haruna is totally clueless on fashion and love, and so to achieve her goal, she asks the cold but dashing Komiyama Yoh to coach her on how to become attractive. This is then the start of an odd relationship which eventually blossoms into a beautiful love story of a very unlikely couple.

Four years ago, my online friends Fangli and Piercing Sword, gave me a few chapters of this manga. It was still unfinished back then but it was so good! It was only about a year ago when I downloaded the completed volumes but I still didn't read it... UNTIL YESTERDAY. And then I went into my crazy raging fangirl love-love mode! :)

I SWEAR! Who wouldn't go into a crazy raging fangirl love-love mode over him...

Komiyama Yoh
*sighhhhhhhh...*

Seriously, I enjoyed this manga series uber-tremendously not just because of the killer looks of Yoh, but actually because of everything that makes Koukou Debut the manga it is. The artwork by itself is awesome. The drawings are clean and consistent, and the panels are structured so strategically. I swear there were a lot of instances when I turned the page and I was in for unexpected (and yummy) surprises! The character designs are very pleasing to look at, with dynamic facial expressions and really cool outfits! And the story is just so wonderful! Although it is fast paced and straight to the point, yet it doesn't fail to pull out various emotional responses from the reader. And despite the many twists and turns of events, there is something very concrete about the plot and the characters. Yoh, Haruna and their circle of friends each had solid personalities which never changed but rather matured amazingly throughout the series. Even supporting characters were developed in a way where you can't hate them but can somehow sympathize with them.

I laughed and cried when I was reading Koukou Debut. I felt Haruna's excitement and her pain, I experienced Yoh's confusion and his affections, I drowned with them as they immersed in their love. I just couldn't help but connect with the story and be reminded of the highs and lows, the joys and pains, the triumphs and frustrations of high school life. And then I wished I also lived and loved like Yoh and Haruna did. I wished everyday for me was like a debut too.

Despite all of these long and incoherent ramblings, I am honestly at a loss to describe how perfect this shoujo manga is. Koukou Debut is sweet and funny. It is a wholesome kind of sexy romance that does not stoop to smut. It is marvelously crafted and superbly entertaining. I have nothing else to say but pure praises and admiration for this series, and I highly recommend this to anyone who just wants to fall in love. I couldn't stop turning the pages at all, and as the series came to its inevitable end, everything was wrapped up perfectly and I was left with a warm sense of satisfaction and pleasure in my heart.

Yes, I definitely am! ^____^

P.S.
I wish they'll do an anime adaptation of this manga but I really don't know if it's possible. A live action movie is in the works though, and although I'm skeptical but I'm also quite excited. :)

2010-11-17T23:53:00.005+08:00

AVATAR D3D

"Everything is backwards now, like out there is the true world, and in here is the dream." - Jake Sully

Yesterday was declared a religious holiday for the Muslims in celebration of Eid al-Adha. My parents and I took this opportunity to have some family bonding and went to SM to watch James Cameron’s AVATAR in Digital 3D.

The first time I saw the ad for this movie was maybe late 2009. I really wasn’t interested in it and did not expect much from it cos I thought it was just another sci-fi flick loaded with CG stuffs. But when I went to watch it in the big screen, I was totally blown away! Akin to how George Lucas has made the universe of Star Wars, or how J.K. Rowling has weaved the realm of Hogwarts, writer/director James Cameron has created a whole new fantasy world complete with its own lush ecosystem and a civilization rich with its own history, culture and language. I am overwhelmed at how he has visualized such a concept, and how he has infused various philosophies and traditions into it, which ultimately resulted to this solid story that stirs not only excitement but also some form of awareness within us. I remember clinging on to my seat, subconsciously holding my breath, as I watched this intricate tale unfold before my very eyes. This has got to be the best movie I’ve seen this year, and when we heard that it was being shown again in Digital 3D, we couldn’t just pass up the experience.

This is only my second time to watch a 3D movie (the first being Resident Evil: Degeneration) and I think this is the first time that SM CDO actually showed a movie in Digital 3D. For PhP 250, you get to wear those plastic glasses for that 3D ride, eat your complimentary popcorn and experience their so-called “shaker seats”. I ooh-ed and ahh-ed with fellow audiences on particularly striking scenes, and purposely attempted to grab foliage and water droplets that appeared near me. I laughed and dodged with everyone else from the balls and arrows and broken glass which went flying into our direction. It was quite enjoyable! And even though I don’t think our cinema has all the right equipment for this technology yet, and their staff still needs some sort of training on how to seat us, but it was, on the whole, good enough. My father did say, while grinning like a little boy, "Chada jud kayu Avatar 3D..." ^o^

2010-11-17T20:30:00.004+08:00

HOI HOI!

I'm so sorry that it's been almost 3 months since I last updated my blog. Primary reason is because I've been SO LAZY, and secondly, cos I was already contemplating on giving up on this blog. I've been quite busy with work and is now at a point in my life where I need to make serious life-changing decisions. And so I figured that I probably will have to altogether abandon this blog soon depending on the course of my life. But right now I'm feeling envious of other people's blogs, so I decided to start writing again. Until when I will continue to blog is a question I'd rather not think about for now.

It's also been so long since I last watched a korean drama. If I am not mistaken, the last k-series I watched was actually 2007's The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince, which I watched some two years ago. I thoroughly enjoyed that series, btw, but never really got to write about it. I've heard of great k-dramas (and even bought DVDs) but just never had the passion to watch them, as they are becoming more and more too angsty for my taste and usually take a long time to finish. Even last year's Boys Over Flowers, which I painstakingly downloaded raw with softsubs, only held my attention for 2 episodes.

So it's really quite a surprise that after I've read from Ate Yeyen's blog that hardsubs are available for My Girlfriend is a Gumiho, I impulsively jumped into the bandwagon and started DIRECT downloading the first two episodes. (It wasn't even a torrent file!) And one random evening after work, I decided to watch a random file from my hard drive and chanced upon those two episodes.

This is a 16-episode romantic comedy telling the not-quite-fortunate(?) tale of a young man who accidentally unleashes a gumiho (nine-tailed fox) from a painting, and how their unusual relationship springs into a great love that surpasses all things (however cliche that may actually sound XD). As much as I would like to elaborate more and give a detailed episode-by-episode recap, I think it would be best to just watch the series for yourself (and get those recaps from more qualified sites like dramabeans ). Since it's pretty much light hearted and funny, so it's so easy and fun to watch. Trust me when I say that every episode will leave you wanting to go on to the next, and when you're all finished you'll get horrible drama withdrawal symptoms and will want to rewatch the series all over again (or like me, watch youtube videos and download just about anything related to it!). But don't let the after effects discourage you from watching cos it will be a total loss if you don't. You'd be missing out on at least three things:

1. The adorable Lee Seung Gi!

I don't know this guy and I swear that when I first saw him I didn't think he was good looking at all. And I swear that until now I still think that way. ^o^ But despite that, I have been totally captivated by this guy! With his charming personality, boyish grin and cute dimples, I just couldn't help but fall in love with his portrayal of Cha Dae Woong. He surprises me with his mischievous antics and impresses me with how his character grew in the story. And when I later learned that he is a singer in real life, I was absolutely surprised and impressed at how strong and smooth and wonderful his voice is! I am now a true convert! And I gladly surrender and wallow in my Lee Seung Gi fandom. *hearts*

2. The dazzling Shin Min Ah!

I must have seen around six of Shin Min Ah's movies. But I think the only TV series I've ever seen her in was Beautiful Days, where she portrayed Lee Byung Hun's bratty sister. I've always thought of her as pretty, but in this drama where she plays Miho the Gumiho, I can only think of her beauty as otherworldly. It doesn't matter how messy her hair is, or how she never seems to change her clothes, or how ridiculous looking is the (action school) bag that she's carrying around -- she's just so radiant and dazzling! Absolutely gorgeous! The combination of her innocence and spunk makes Miho such a lovable character that you can't help but be bewitched.

3. The winning tale of Forbidden LOVE!

I often equate Kdramas with Angst + Tragedy. But thank God for the Hong sisters who not only gave this series an appealing plot, but have also infused it with a good dose of comic relief and amusing twists. Add to that a great mix of supporting characters and a wonderful OST to boot (Seung Gi-sshi singing 2 of the tracks + Lee Sun Hee's Fox Rain = WIN!). Every episode never failed to make me laugh, and also cry. And every episode always left me craving for the next, while silently cheering and praying for our Hoi Hoi couple. I must admit though that somewhere in the middle, the story fell into the typical depressing korean melodrama that seems to go around in circles. But thankfully it didn't drag on too long! I won't tell you how it ends, but overall, I'd say I was quite satisfied and happy with this series and will definitely be re-watching this, as well as sharing it with my friends.

Hoi Hoi, GO watch it now!!! ^_______________^

2010-08-27T23:58:00.024+08:00

ONE NIGHT STAND XD

Funny how some things just happen when you least expect them to.

I went to the bank yesterday and while waiting for my turn, I started scrutinizing the lady who was standing in the counter, talking with the teller. Her back was turned to me, and I noted her trendy clothes and most especially her shoes! They were flat and comfy, the kind I would love to wear to work.

I didn't look at her when she took her seat though, as I was busy preparing for my turn. Then suddenly I heard someone calling out my name from behind. I turned around to look and was in for a surprise.

The lady with the comfy shoes was actually my college classmate who has migrated to the US almost 8 years ago! It felt really weird since it was really unexpected, and we both stood up and gave each other a hug. We weren't really that close back then, but she's really cheerful and sweet so you can't help but like her. We have also kept in touch through facebook and the Cdotaku forum, since we share a common interest in animes, mangas, dramas and fangirling. ^^

So we talked for a while and then decided to meet up. So today, we made plans for dinner at Butcher's Best Barbeque together with two other college classmates. And then we went to have coffee at Bo's. We just talked about random stuffs and well, other not-so-random stuffs. It was fun reminiscing about our college years and talking about our college friends. Before we knew it, it was almost midnight, and we all needed to hit the sack.

Thank you LongLong, LabLab, and PengPeng. I had so much fun with all of you tonight.

2010-08-27T13:05:00.017+08:00

ANIME-TURNED-MOVIES TO DEFINITELY WATCH OUT FOR!

I was browsing through the net when I chanced upon these yummy trailers!

This is the live action movie for the music-themed anime BECK: Mongolian Chop Squad. Although I haven't seen the anime yet, but a friend has recommended this to me. And I'm also looking forward to it because Mizushima Hiro's on it. He's cute. :)
Judging from the anime, this slice-of-life movie will probably be about peer relationships and personal triumphs. And yes, it will have A LOT of music in it too. XD

This next one's still set for 2011 but I'm so excited for this live action movie of Gantz. I've only read the first chapter of the manga, and haven't seen the anime yet, but this one was also highly recommended to me. And I think I'll like this because it's psycho-suspense, and I'm a sucker for that. ^^

This live movie is uber-loaded with bishies, starting with Hongo Kanata whom we all remember as the cute kid in Moonchild who grew up to be the Prince of Tennis; Matsuyama Kenichi, this rising talented idol whom we loved as L and Krausser; and my Arashi luv, Ninomiya Kazunari, who never fails to brighten up my day with his boyish grin. He was great by the way in the Hollywood movie, Letters From Iwo Jima. That movie's packed with a lot of wonderful Japanese actors, and directed by no less than Clint Eastwood himself, and it's something I'll recommend if you're into war movies.

And last but definitely not the least is my most awaited movie for this year, the live movie version of Kimi ni Todoke!!! ^_________^ I've been soOoOoOOooooOOO high on the anime when it was airing, and soOoOoOOooooOOO high on the anime even when it ended, and just when I am starting to move on from my Kazehaya-fandom, we get this movie!!! I thought the girls who play Sawako and Kurumi are really cute, and they do kinda look like the characters. At first I was really surprised (but not disappointed) that Miura Haruma was cast as Kazehaya-kun. I know he's a great actor and has even downloaded all of his dramas, but I think his face has a really strong expression, and he's always been acting tough guy roles (i.e. Bloody Monday, Koizora, Gokusen 3, Crows Zero II etc). But when I viewed the trailer (over and over and over...), I realized that he can look soOoOoOOooooOOO sweet as well!! I can't wait for him to show my ultra-favorite shy/embarrassed Kazehaya-look! And doesn't Miura Haruma, in some angles, kinda remind you of Gackt? Haaaayyy, I am so in love. And I am just so ecstatic! I can't wait for September 25 (and for the day when it finally gets subbed!!!).

Haaaayyy. I think I'm just soOoOoOOooooOOO happy. :3

On a side note, I've also browsed through some ongoing/upcoming korean dramas. Ate Yeyen has fangirl-ed over Coffee House so I'll think I'll add that to my watch list. And then she's also watching My Girlfriend is a Nine Tailed Fox and it looks like something that's so much fun (plus the pretty Shin Min Ah's playing the fox!), so I think I'll add that to my list as well. I'm also looking forward to Playful Kiss, the k-drama version of Itazura Na Kiss/It Started With A Kiss! (which is my 2nd favoritest manga-turned-anime-turned-multiple-drama-versions, next to HanaDan). Kim Hyun Joong gets the main lead, and I don't know if he can act, but I guess it's not much different from his Boys Over Flowers role. But truly, surely, definitely, I will be watching this!!! ^___^

2010-08-26T09:35:00.000+08:00

AND I CRY FRAUD!!

A few months ago, I had the opportunity to get my own credit card, papers-free and hassle-free. Although I don't use it that often, but I find it convenient to pay for some stuffs using plastic. I've always been careful when using it, and meticulously logs every purchase on my journal so as not to forget. So I was surprised last night when I opened my credit card statement for this month and saw a whopping P12,256.72 billed to me!

Scrutinizing the transaction details, I noted several online purchases charged to me which I never made. In my state of panic, I called up my sister who told me to call up the company's domestic toll free number and report the anomaly. I reached their customer service agent who advised me to write a letter of dispute and she then had my card declared as fraud and had it blocked from any use. I told her I am definitely NOT paying for those extra purchases.

So now I don't have a card. =___=

I know there are a lot of these scams nowadays, but I never expected it to happen to me. I hope this matter will be investigated and will be resolved soon. And I also hope credit card companies will further make the necessary measures to protect their clients.

2010-08-12T23:56:00.001+08:00

THE ROCK

Decided to come home for the night to grab some stuffs and see my parents. I brought home a box of pineapple pie and around 8 liters of Fit and Right (how I got those bottles is a long story I'd rather not talk about right now...). So I lugged home my pasalubongs and took the bus to CDO.

I usually just sleep during bus rides but the ongoing movie caught my attention. I thought the background music was really familiar. Squinting my eyes (since I didn't have my glasses on) and scrutinizing the film, I realized that it was the 1996 movie THE ROCK, starring Sean Connery, Nicolas Cage and Ed Harris. I remember that this was my most favorite movie back in high school, and watching it again tonight made me realize that yes, I still love this movie! :)

I remember that I used to watch a lot of movies during my high school years. My mom, sister and I would often spend our Saturdays in the cinemas, and I would average around 40 movies per year (is that a lot?). That was way back when DVDs and downloads were still not the fad. Now I have a huge box of DVDs at home, plus more than a hundred movie titles in my hard drive, and I just have no idea when I'll be watching these. I miss those days when everyone just went to watch cinemas on weekends, and come monday, it would be the topic of every conversation. Times change though, and although I still watch the movies with my parents as often as we can, somehow it's just not the same as before.

Anyway, when I got off the bus, I took the taxi to Missy Bon Bon where I bought some ensaymadas to bring back to Malaybalay tomorrow. Then I had Butter Pecan gelato. YUM! :) Then lugging around my 1 box of pineapple pie, 3 boxes of ensaymadas, 8 liters of Fit and Right and my bag, I took another taxi to a hotel I'd rather not name here. A certain company in Manila has been calling me frequently on my phone, inviting me to dinner and to get my gift certificate in said hotel. Since I was already late for the dinner, I thought I could just go and get my gift certificate, since they told me to drop by anytime this week. But this REALLY RUDE and REALLY ARROGANT PAKINGSY*T ~~GAY~~ GUY looked at me without batting an eyelash, and immediately brushed me away and said my name wasn't on the list. I was so insulted by the way he treated me, and I wanted to just strangle him to death. But instead, I made some frustrated gestures and told him that I didn't have the time for this ~~cr@p~~ and walked away with my 1 box of pineapple pie, 3 boxes of ensaymadas, 8 liters of Fit and Right and my bag. I swear it was humiliating to be treated that way, and if I wasn't so damn tired, I really would have called up their main office to file a complaint. But I really just wanted to go home.

So now I'm home. Ate a sumptuous dinner my mom brought home from Pearlmont, and now I'm updating my torrent downloads, and my life. I'm losing sleep again though, so let's just end it here for now.

2010-07-16T23:19:00.003+08:00

THANK YOU, GLEN!

A few days ago I met up with my high school classmate, Glen, and now I just want to write this quick THANK YOU post for her for three wonderful things she has done for me this week:

1. She invited us for a wonderful dinner in her house last night.

One of our high school classmates, Juvy, is going off to Japan to do God's work, and we might not get to see her for another 3 years. So Glen organized this really simple yet elegant dinner for her. Our two other classmates, Gervie and Jen (plus husband Itong), were also with us. We had a really great fellowship, reminiscing old memories and catching up on new stuffs. Everyone just felt relaxed inside Glen's cozy house and eating the sumptuous meal she prepared. But I don't know if Juvy knew it was a despedida party for her. None of us actually had the heart to tell her goodbye, and I kinda messed up and wasn't able to prepare the gift for her. But we had a grand time anyway so I'm just so thankful.

2. She invited me to join a care group meeting.

Lord, You alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing.
You guard all that is mine.
Psalm 16:5
Tonight, Glen personally brought me to a care group meeting held at Serendipity Cafe and Resto. I've long wanted (and needed) a small group of Christian friends whom I can be accountable to and responsible for, but just never got around to joining one. I guess I'm just one lost sheep with my messed up life and priorities. But praise God for Glen, who was quick to invite me to join a group composed of young, single ladies.

So I met some new friends: Chai, the group leader who works for a bank; Mizpah, a BS Psych student; Gigi, a first year law student; and Iris and Tia, who are med students. It was my first time to join a care group, so I kinda didn't know what to expect (or what they were expecting from me). But the group was warm and friendly, and I just had a good time getting to know them. Most importantly, I got to feed on God's Word and start allowing Him to fix my broken life. I just feel so "wrong" right now, and I know only God can heal me. And I know that He will if I just let Him take control.

I will bless the Lord who guides me;
even at night my heart instructs me.
I know the Lord is always with me.
I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me.
Psalm 16: 7-8

3. She told me about this place where we could possibly transfer.

It's been almost a year since we've moved into our current residence, and although this is a wonderful place, but it's just too small and cramped for us. So we've been thinking of the possibility of moving again once our contract here expires, and Glen told me about this apartment near their house. I contacted the owner today, and I'm quite interested in the offer. I told my parents about it, and they also started considering it. We might check out the place and let's just see what happens. *crosses fingers*

Thank you Lord for Glen. She is really such a blessing. ^__________^

2010-07-07T23:45:00.001+08:00

TODAY WAS A USELESS DAY

Today was one of the most useless days of my life. I woke up at 630am, which was pretty early since I didn't have work, had breakfast and went online for a while before preparing myself for today's activities. Here's what I had in mind:
1. Go to GSIS to secure an Ecard.
2. Go to SSS to have my photo taken and ID made.
3. Go to PMA to get my Powercard and renew my membership to the association.
4. Go to PLDT-Philcom to get my billing statements.
5. Go to Gaisano (for no specific reason).
6. Go to Ate Gigi's house for pedicure.

So off I went, excited to do so many things today, and guess what happened!?

1. Went to GSIS and saw the snake-like queue for priority numbers. They started giving out the numbers since 4am, and I was already 6 hours behind the line. I figured I'd be wasting too much time waiting, so I decided to leave.

2. Went to SSS and saw no queue! Went up to the security guard and learned that they already finished handing out all the priority numbers for the day (so that is why there's no line!). To save face, I pretended instead to ask for the E6 application form, but I already knew that it can be downloaded from the net.

3. Went to PMA but they couldn't find my Powercard. To save face (again!), I told them that I'll pay my annual dues instead, but I learned that I was PhP500 short of the amount, so I ended up not paying and not saving my face at all. ^^;

4. Went to PLDT-Philcom and learned that due to some system problem, I still don't have my bill since December. I crossed my fingers and hoped that meant free connection forever, but I think they will eventually send me a collective bill, and I'll prolly be too broke by then to pay up.

5. Went to Gaisano. Bought several Tommy Hilfiger swim shorts for my father and myself. They were really cute. I then had lunch at Chowking and finally got a taste of the Orange Chicken Lauriat. It wasn't anything special at all. Boo.

6. Went to Ate Gigi's house so that she could fix the pain my ingrown toenails is causing me. She wasn't home. Boo again.

It was still 3pm but I opted to go home instead and played Plants vs Zombies. I finally finished the Adventure Mode, had noodles for dinner, and brewed really bad coffee (too bland). Then I fixed up my list and now I'm blogging.

Tomorrow is the start of more mis-adventures. Suoh and his dad are coming over for a visit, and on Friday, my sister will be coming home with her boyfriend. It's going to be a very busy week ahead.

2010-07-07T22:27:00.001+08:00

A NATURAL KIND OF HIGH

This is a really late entry, so I'll keep it short. Last month I met up with some friends and here's what happened...

JUNE 14 :
My high school classmate, Christine (aka Tabs), came home to the Philippines after around 6 or 7 years in Canada. We met up along with out other classmates, Gervie, Glen and Juvy. We had a sumptious dinner at Butcher's Best Barbeque, then has gelato at Missy Bon Bon, then had coffee at Figaro's. Although the time was short, but we really had a great fellowship reminiscing about our past, and updating each other of our present lives. Of course Tabs was the queen of the night, for she generously paid for all our bills. XD Gervie, on the other hand, was our gallant knight in shining armour - he played chauffeur and drove each one of us home. XD

JUNE 16 :
My friend Hya, who was on one-month leave from her Pedia residency training in PGH, came to visit us, and so I ditched work to go out with her and our classmates, Ann (who's also on leave from PGH) and Shay (who also ditched work XD). Shay's sister also went with us.

We decided to go to Zipzone in Dahilayan, Manolo Fortich, Bukidnon, for some extreme once-in-a-lifetime experience - ZIPLINING! The complete package was composed of three rides: 320m long, 150m long, and the crazy 840m long ride, which proudly boasts as Asia's longest dual zipline elevated at 4500 feet above sea level. I'm not a sporty person at all, but I definitely enjoyed the feel of the cool wind on my face, the pine trees (and ulp! death drop) below me, and the adrenaline rush as I flew through the air.

YES! THIS IS ME!!!

There were other exciting things to do in Dahilayan such as the driving the ATV trail, Zorbing, and visiting some nature parks and garden. However, we couldn't stay long and had to hit the road already. I don't know if I will ever go back there again, but the memories we made in that place are forever etched in my heart (char! :3).

2010-06-15T23:47:00.002+08:00

WAR OF THE GODS

I recently got interested in Norse Mythology because of two things:

Neil Gaiman's American Gods

and

Matantei Loki Ragnarok

American Gods is a novel that tells the tale of Shadow, an ex-con who was recently paroled and found himself working for the mysterious Mr Wednesday, and got caught in a war between the old gods and the modern day gods. I'm not very familiar with myths and legends from around the world, and I'm sure one who is well versed on this topic can further appreciate this bestselling novel. Despite my lack of knowledge, I still enjoyed reading about the characters and discovering their secrets as the story unfolded. I love the side stories inserted in between and the clever plot twist in the end. It is after all a Neil Gaiman novel, and you can't expect anything less from the master storyteller himself!

Now as I was finishing the book, for the lack of other useful things to do, I started watching Matantei Loki Ragnarok (aka Mythical Detective Loki). I thought it was the appropriate anime to watch at that time. I was impressed by the opening theme but was initially bored during the first few episodes. I grew up feeding on Nancy Drew books and immensely enjoy detective stories, but I just didn't quite get the hang of this anime. It was on episode 8 when I found out about the secret identity of Yamino-kun that I finally sat up and started taking interest on the crazy relationships between the characters. And then on episode 13, this guy came along...

... and my world changes... <3

Matantei Loki Ragnarok is the story of the trickster god Loki who was cast away from the realm of the gods and sent here on earth in a young boy's body. In order to go back, he has to collect evil auras, and so he opens a detective agency that deals with the paranormal. As the story progresses, more and more gods cross over to this world to stop Loki from achieving his goal.

Now I don't really have a thing for shotas, but characters with alter egos sometimes attract me (well, especially if the other side of the coin is a yummy bishounen *hearts!*). Loki (in shota form) somewhat reminds me of Niwa Daisuke from D.N.Angel and love of my life Li Shaoran from Card Captor Sakura. Most of the time Loki just appears in his kiddie form, but I really get excited over rare scenes where he gets to show us his charming, mischievous side, such as this...

<3 <3 <3!!!

The series ended at 26 episodes, and although I didn't really expect much from this anime, but I would have wanted more yummy-licious Loki. Hahay. Now I have to hit the books (and wikipedia) and do more readings on myths and stuffs, just so I'll be a little bit more wiseass than I was yesterday.

2010-05-11T22:22:00.002+08:00

REACHING YOU (and my goals...)

Although it has minimized a bit, I must admit that my Kimi Ni Todoke flames of fandom still hasn't died out yet.
*points at blog lay-out* See!?!

For my Nokia 5000, I use a pic of Kazehaya as wallpaper (so I can perpetually stare at his loving smile<3).
For my Sony Ericsson G605, I'm using this:

I love this picture!

Everytime I look at this image, a lot of thoughts run through my mind. What is Kazehaya thinking while his arms are wrapped around Sawako? We know he's possessive and all, and here we see him acting really boldly and playfully. There is a hint of satisfaction and smugness in his smile, yet he's also blushing as if really shy. Look at those long arms and big hands. Is he hugging her tightly or holding her loosely? What on earth is he thinking!?!

And Sawako... What is she thinking right now? We can see that she's a bit of in shock, probably from embarrassment or surprise. Her eyes are wide with disbelief, is she fearful, or just naive that she's too happy where she is? Her arms are held up. Is that a sort of defensive move or was she just caught unaware when Kazehaya grasped her from behind? And that stray strand of hair atop her head (ahoge FTW!), did she take a bath this morning!? x___x

These are some of the questions I like to think about whenever I stare at this wallie. I think I'll keep this image for some time on my phone. Right now, I still haven't found a new anime too go crazy over, although I am currently following Kaichou wa Maid-sama, which is also really fun and Usui is mucho delicioso. I also recently finished The Gargoyle of the Yoshinagas and Himawari, underrated animes which I believe deserve more attention and love from otakus. Among so many other titles, I'm downloading Bakemonogatari right now, which I think will be a real feast since I love animes with interesting and unusual plots. *sigh* I wish I have more time to watch animes. The to-watch list just keeps getting longer and longer, but I'm not using my spare time wisely. I have to be more firm in reaching my goals, or else I'll be stuck with a whole lot of videos which I couldn't possibly finish watching in this lifetime.

2010-05-10T23:55:00.004+08:00

OUR COUNTRY NEEDS AN ALLY OF JUSTICE! BRING IN ... IRON MAN! XD

I was working alone this morning cos my partner Lloyd went to CDO last night so that he could vote early today. When he got back around noon, it was my turn to hurry off and catch a bus ride home so that I too could exercise my right of suffrage. I thought I would not be able to join this year's election but I really wanted to support G1BO. I really hope he wins cos it would be such a waste if we let the chance for him to lead us just simply slip by. I really pray he will win. May God bless our country.

I got home around 3pm, and after a quick meal, my mother took me to the public school in Nazareth which served as our voting precinct. My parents already got me my priority number and details in the morning so when I got there, all I had to do was simply show them my card and I was quickly ushered in. They looked me up in their list, saw my name (and old pic!), and made me sign on their registry. Then they gave me the ballot and a smartmatic marker. I already had a list ready in hand to make the whole process easier. As I shaded in number 8 for idol G1BO, I felt my heart swell and a warm sense of pride filled me. His name was the only one I wanted to choose, I really couldn't care less about the rest. After I finished and rechecked my choices, I stood up and inserted in my ballot into the PCOS machine and got the congratulatory message. I thought of pocketing the smartmatic marker just for the heck of it. It could prove useful in marking my CDs. But one of the ladies took it from me and ushered me back to the front desk, where I impressed my thumb mark on their master list. Then they dropped this huge blob of indelible ink on my index finger, so now it's all purple.

It's really better automated. Prior to election day, I've heard a lot of negative criticisms about the new system and how it will probably flop, but I've always thought that things would work out fine. Of course there may be a few glitches, but I think it was OK overall. Thank God for that! However, I thought the phrase "Vote for not more than one" in the ballot was quite confusing. Why didn't they just write "Vote ONE only"?

Afterwards, my mother and I went to Divisoria to buy cake and ice cream and ensaymada. Today is my parents' 29th wedding anniversary and it was also one of the reasons I came home today. (Well I wanted to go home yesterday for Mothers Day too, but sadly, I couldn't get away from work.) We went home to get my father, then we had dinner at Rai Rai Ken. We then parted ways cos I wanted to watch a movie, but they needed to go home to catch their favortie TV Soap (er.. NO, NOT Agua Bendita XD).

So yey!, I finally got to watch Iron Man 2! My mother told me earlier that it wasn't really that good but I didn't want to be swayed by her opinion! And after seeing the film, I beg to disagree!!! Robert Downey Jr as Tony Stark is absolute ♥ ♥ ♥! I really enjoyed his crazy antics, his superior attitude, and his egotistical speech (I have successfully privatized world peace! (^o^)v). While he might have acted foolishly and arrogantly and narcissistically in the beginning (which by the way are his appealing traits XD), I just simply love how his character grows in the end. I think he's my most favorite comic-turned-live-movie superhero.

I was a bit disappointed though to find that Terrence Howard did not reprise his role as Rhodey. Don Cheadle did a great job, but I somehow found it awkward to see a different face for a well loved character (*also think Maria Bello in Mummy 3* =___=). I do wish they made the final battle between Ivan Vanko and Iron Man longer and even more action packed. I somewhat felt that the genius Russian physicist needs more screen time to literally lash out his fury and vengeance. Lastly, I was also hoping they would further build up the relationship of Tony and Pepper, but maybe that would be asking for too much cheese. XD It was overall satisfying though, and I was immensely entertained. After all, who wouldn't be captivated over THIS!?! ^____^

YUMMY!!! =P

I grabbed a grande cup of Espresso Crumble at Bo's before getting a ride home. I dropped by Divisoria again and gave in to the temptation of buying some DVDs. *sheepish* My spoils for the day are: Spiral, Hana Yori Dango, Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge, and the Taiwanese drama Legend of Brown Sugar Chivalries. More backlogs to watch! XD

I feel very happy today cos I got home to unwind, but tomorrow it's back to the gloomy hospital life again.

2010-05-09T23:10:00.002+08:00

Today is for my mother; tomorrow is for my motherland!

My Vote is FOR YOU!

CHOOSE WISELY.

I have chosen well.

2010-05-09T19:40:00.004+08:00

FIND YOURSELF

After sumptuous roast beef dinner last night, I went back to the hospital and planned on hitting the sack early. I was quite tired physically, and my eyes were kinda heavy. I haven't watched much TV lately, so I chose to turn it on for a while just to kill some time before I go to sleep. Flipping through channels, I saw Cars being featured again on Disney Channel and decided to watch it.

I wasn't able to watch this in cinemas in 2006 because I didn't think too highly about it. I wasn't interested at all in watching a movie about cars. But some time last year, while at work, I got the chance to watch this featured in Disney Channel. And I realized I would have missed out a lot if I skipped this one out.

Cars is the story of rookie race car Lightning McQueen, one of the three who tied in the last championship race for the Piston Cup. A tiebreaker event was set after a week, but by some turn of events, Lightning McQueen got lost on the way and somehow ended up in the long forgotten town of Radiator Springs. His encounter with the townsfolk who eventually became his friends, and his experiences make him realize that there is so much more to life than just winning a cup, and this attitude causes him to emerge as a true victor in the end.

I cried the first time I watched this film, and I cried again last night. I'm overly emotional at times and just cannot stop my tears from flowing (much to my embarrassment ^^;). I just love how the characters and their relationships developed in this movie, and how everything turned out right in the end. I can consider this one of my favorite animated films, along with Meet the Robinsons and Horton Hears a Who (which can also reduce me into a freakin' crybaby despite my having watched them several times already =__=)

This is the ending song of the movie - Find Yourself by Brad Paisley - which is a really nice and appropriate song for this film.

After that, I flipped the channels again and chanced upon Godzilla in Cartoon Network. I've watched this when I was younger and thought then that Matthew Broderick looked really cute here. So I got to finish the movie around 12mn, and hurriedly turned off the TV before I could find something else to watch again and a reason to lose more sleep.

2010-05-06T22:42:00.005+08:00

RELEASE THE KRACKEN!

I know this entry is a bit too late but the last movie I watched was Clash of the Titans. Because of work schedule, I think I got to watch this movie only on its third week of screening. By then, everyone else in the world has already seen the movie, opinions and reviews made, and the entire movie spoiled for me. Nevertheless, I still went to watch this movie with high expectations...

...and went home slightly disappointed.

Not really disappointed. Just a bit.

When I first saw the trailer, I was really excited. I really like fantasy films set in mythical worlds, plus it seemed to boast of great special effects and a distinguished set of actors. Sam Worthington, who gained worldwide fame in the blockbuster Avatar, was also cast as the lead. So overall, it seemed really promising.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but it just somehow didn’t live up to my expectations. We have a stunning line-up of actors yet there was minimal character development. We have a great premise of a story, but it somehow ended too soon (but I guess they probably stuck with the original story, which is reasonable). We have awesome effects, then again there’s really nothing new and exciting there. Not a single part of the movie made any significant or lasting imprint on me. Maybe if you’ve seen the 1981 movie and compared it with the new, perhaps you can say that this is so much better. But for someone like me who hasn’t seen the old film, and is living in the era of 3D and SFX, I just wasn’t too impressed.

It wasn’t really bad. It just wasn't that good either.

Now I wonder how I'll feel about Ironman 2. I so love the first movie, and how Robert Downey Jr played the carefree Tony Stark. Now if only I can find the time to bust out of the hospital life and have some well-deserved R&R...

2010-05-04T22:01:00.002+08:00

OH WHY, OH WHY...

... DO YOU HAVE TO BE ...

... SO DAMN ...

... HOT!?! ...

New Bishie TAKUMI USUI from Kaichou wa Maid-sama ...
Bishie Luv coming right at yah! <3<3<3

2010-05-03T21:40:00.000+08:00

BEING PATIENT TO PATIENTS

I always joke that the reason I am a doctor is because I don't want to be patient. Actually that's not true, because I am often a gentle-mannered, polite, and easy-going person in almost all aspects of my life. Most of the time you won't see me get angry, or lash out against another person, or make sarcastic or mean remarks right in front of the person concerned. (Although I do have a loud and beefy voice which is often mistaken as an "annoyed" tone, and I can be honest to you about certain things, and I really don't want to tell you about stuffs suoh12 and I talk about in private regarding certain people -- BUT THAT'S NOT REALLY MY POINT HERE. XD) But most often than not, I'm really just your nice and friendly and accommodating neighborhood person. So getting me really angry early in the morning is totally stretching it to the limits. Which was what happened today.

I admitted a case of blunt trauma secondary to a vehicular crash at around 3AM today. The driver-turned-patient was drunk, and I had to bit my tongue to keep myself from saying that his foolishness and recklessness just made me lose much-needed sleep. I assessed him and managed him as a professional physician should do, even calling up the rad tech to do STAT Xrays. And even without presenting any insurance or deposits, we even started antibiotics on him. I was so busy with him that it was almost 530AM when I finally got to go back to my room. But not before I talked with his mother and explained his condition to the best of my ability, and reassured her that come morning, we will suture his wound and he will be seen by his attending surgeon who was already informed of this admission.

So imagine my confusion, and annoyance, when I was awakened after an hour by our nurse, who tells me that this certain patient's watcher (a sister who just arrived that morning) is making a scene in front of the nurses' station demanding to see a doctor and see something done to her brother. I immediately went down to see what was the problem, and introduced myself politely to this lady (whom I just saw for the first time). To my (groggy) surprise, she started b*tching about how we didn't do anything to her patient, and accused us of prioritizing money matters over the saving of a life. I rebutted her every allegation, because I know these weren't true at all. But she proceeded on raging and even speaking in english, and I also retorted back in english. I was reassuring her that her brother was being monitored properly and that his condition was stable. But I was also already subtly adding sarcasm to my remarks, and I had raised my voice a bit just to show her who's the authority here. She still b*tched till the very end, and said that I'd better be sure of what I was telling her. I turned away in annoyance because I didn't want to talk to someone who didn't want to listen to me anyway.

I went back to my room and noticed that my hands were shaking. I've never been good at confronting people or getting mad at them, and it always shows. My hands always shake and my speech is often all jumbled up. Most often I end up saying the wrong and lame things, and the words don't really sound quite right. Even my "angry tone" just doesn't sound at all convincing. Sometimes I also get tears in my eyes, which I always hate. I always seem to cry whenever I'm ovewhelmed with emotions. It's really quite embarrassing and inappropriate. Good thing I didn't cry in front of that lady. I know what I said to her and what I did to her patient were right, and what she said was plain ridiculous and her haughty attitude totally unnecessary. Deep down my conscience was clean. Yet I still couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty because of our exchange of conversation. I really don't like getting into these kinds of things. Couldn't we just have talked normally and peacefully and professionally instead?

The patient was eventually seen by his attending surgeon. His condition was stable all throughout this morning. His lacerated wound was sutured and a cranial CT scan (negative findings!) done. But all the while his sister still kept her b*tchy attitude, tormenting a lot of our hospital staff with her english words (except our Chief Nurse, whose glare alone can make you simply shut up).

Later in the afternoon however, a chest tube was inserted into his right lung, and that's when our surgeon noted he still seemed to be in a lot of pain. So he did a diagnostic peritoneal lavage and noted that the patient was bleeding inside his abdomen. So we immediately scheduled for an emergency explore lap, and guess who was called up to scrub in as surgical assistant? Lucky Me. It wasn't as toxic as it appeared though, and in no time the operation was done, and the patient was stable all throughout this ordeal (and hopefully until he gets discharged).

The events this afternoon made me think twice again about my attitude today. I do not claim to be a superior doctor nor to be a very knowledgeable one. I know I am lacking in many aspects and that I need to try harder. And everyday I always keep praying that God won't let me have patients that I do not have the ability to handle or manage, and somehow I get through every working day of my life learning through my experiences, through my peers, through my mentors. Although I swear to God that I managed that patient well, I still can't help but re-think about my attitude towards my patient and towards his sister, especially after I reassured her that her brother's condition was stable, yet he was still wheeled into the OR in the afternoon. Perhaps I was too haughty and overconfident? Perhaps I was too irritable and careless? I really don't know...

I know I am not perfect, but I do want to become a really good and holistic doctor. And I can only do so if I depend on the guidance of the Ultimate Healer and try harder in everything. I need to continue to pray to God for a heart of humility and compassion, and the attitude to be more patient to my patients (and their b*tchy sisters).

2010-05-02T20:46:00.005+08:00

FALLING IN LOVE WITH YOU . . . ALL OVER AGAIN

I just finished watching Ranma 1/2 : Akumu Shunminko, which is a Weekly Shonen Sunday 50th Anniversary Celebration Special. The artwork is a bit different from the series, and somehow I feel that Ranma (girl vesion) just grew bigger boobs. XD But right now all I can do is simply make a deep satisfied sigh and grin with much pleasure. I would have actually preferred a different ending which gives more emphasis on the love-love aspect, but I know that would be expecting too much from two of the most stubborn anime characters in history. XD

Just a brief overview of this anime special: Due to some accident, Akane falls into a deep sleep, although she is still "awake" physically. As she is making these random weird dreams, in reality however, she is reacting to her surroundings. Well, mostly she’s just leaving behind a path of destruction. And like a typical Ranma 1/2 episode, everyone joins in to make the situation really crazy. My heart was greatly overjoyed to see all the familiar faces, but mostly I was just thrilled to be staring into the handsome face of my Ran-chan.<3 I mean who wouldn’t go crazy over this...

*droooooool...*

This was when he suddenly turned his head in surprise, and was also when I felt my world stop for a split second.
He is just so... MANLY. <3 *swoons*

I know it’s plain crazy to call an “otoko onna” (boy-girl) MANLY, but ever since I laid my eyes on my Ranma, I can only describe him as such. The many expressions on his face, the broad shoulders, the strong muscles on his back just make me wanna reach out and touch ~~him~~ the TV screen. I almost forgot what it felt like to be so in love with my Ran-chan, but now I just fell madly in love with him all over again! This silly fan girl in me is that foolish indeed!

Hahaaaayyy... \(>w<)/

2010-05-02T19:24:00.018+08:00

ON DEAD ENDS AND HOPE, AND LUGGING AROUND YOUR BAGGAGE IN MCDONALDS

I didn’t really get a decent sleep the other night, and it was even worse last night since I got to hit the sack around 4-ish AM already (dunno what I was doing... x__x). But even though I only had around three hours of sleep, somehow I felt rested. And I praise God for that. Because it meant that I was able to wake up early (and not groggy), and had the opportunity to attend the first church service. I was scheduled for 24H duty today and time-in is 8AM, but I asked permission to be late so that I can go to church. I felt really blessed and thankful because Mam Cha and Doc Geng told me it was OK to be late. So lugging behind my two huge bags, I set off to go to church before leaving town for work.

I haven’t been to church for quite a while already because of work. I know that’s really a poor and sorry excuse and I actually don’t like using that reason but that’s really the truth. I also don’t have a small group, and also don’t get to attend bible studies or prayer meetings or any gatherings for that matter. Sometimes I also don’t follow my quiet time diligently. In short, I feel that I am spiritually starved. But praise God because in Him there’s HOPE, and that was exactly the message this morning.

Pastor Chris opened the message with a witty anecdote about his sliding experience in Splash Island several years ago. And he summed up his experience by saying that
1. Life is a ride that we should enjoy, and
2. When you hit rock bottom, don’t panic. There is a lifeguard.
And then he proceeded to discuss about DEAD ENDS and HOPE, using the Israelites’ exodus out of Egypt and through the Red Sea as an example. I thought it was a very exciting message, direct to the point, with very effective powerpoint slides. He even pointed out a contrast between the Worldly responses in facing dead ends (We fear. We cry. We panic. We blame.) and the Christian way of dealing with such (We fear not. We stand firm. We stay still. We let God fight for us.), appropriately backed up with the Holy Scriptures of course. And while listening to our Pastor teach us and guide us concerning these truths, I couldn’t help but shed a few tears (which I promptly wiped away with the back of my hand). I always tend to cry during church service (to my utter embarrassment XD). Somehow I just can’t control the tears whenever I am reminded of God’s goodness, mercy and love for us, and especially for me. I am so unworthy, and yet I know He cares for me deeply. What a truly awesome God He is! ^____^

After the service, I dragged my two heavy bags along and went for a quick stop at McDonalds to use their restroom and buy some food. I felt a bit embarrassed cos the whole place was packed, and I somehow looked like a runaway. Nevertheless, feeding myself is a much higher priority than keeping face, and so I just had to endure the curious looks of some onlookers. I then left the place, took a taxi to the terminal, and rode the bus to Malaybalay. I arrived around 1230PM. Good thing it didn’t seem like a busy day for Doc Geng.

So now I’m on 24H duty but I am just so tired. I’m not really sleepy, although I have been yawning countless times since I came here. I just feel really tired. I hope there won’t be a lot of patients tonight, so that my physical body can at least recover a bit. But nevertheless I’m really happy, because I got to go to church. And that really made my day.

2010-05-01T23:24:00.000+08:00

DON'T MAKE LABOR DAY JOKES!

Last night, I was already feeling smug because I was scheduled to leave Camiguin by morning. I was telling my nurses that they should expect a lot of OB patients today because it is "LABOR" Day. It was an old joke I like to crack which often receives a lot of giggles. It was probably a bad idea though, cos after that, I had to admit not just one, but TWO walk-in OB patients, and had to wait until their babies were delivered! Plus add 3 more new admissions, and that means NO DECENT SLEEP on my last night of duty. :c

Boo. 0__o

I left Camiguin around 1PM. I took the barge-bus route instead of the usual fast craft because I didn't want to wait until 4PM. It was a good thing I met one of our previous nurses while boarding the barge, so time flew faster as we chatted about work and stuffs. It was also easier to get a seat on the bus because of my companion. I arrived in CDO around 430PM.

I had a quick Jollibee lunch at home, then went off to buy ballpens for work tomorrow. Then I texted my korean employer before, asking her if she still needed my assistance. She actually contacted me early this week asking me if I can hook a bottle of IV fluid for her elderly churchmate. She was quick to text back saying that she'll pick me up and then we went off to buy the necessary materials. I brought my Mom along cos I know she's interested to meet korean people. After doing my job (and being awestruck of their enormous mansion), my Mom and I then went to the mall to meet up with my Dad and have dinner at Bigby's. Then we went home.

Now I'm so tired but I still have to get ready for work tomorrow. I actually don't want to go on duty tomorrow (just right after I got home from 10 days of work from Camiguin!), but there's no one else to cover for my two colleagues, who are off to Manila to attend the Philippine College of Physicians (PCP) Convention. I actually wanted to go too, but nobody else would be left to go on duty in the hospital. I figured I needed the money anyway.

I'll try to blog more often this week. But right now, I really need some much needed shut-eye.

2010-04-20T03:20:00.001+08:00

RANDOM-NESS!

I just got back from Malaybalay City. I have just ONE DAY to do a bunch of stuffs before I leave for Camiguin again on Wednesday. I need to do the following tomorrow (in no particular order):
- watch Clash of the Titans
- drop by PRC to get my license (note to self: MUST WEAR SHOES!)
- go to the bank, pay bills
- visit the dressmaker and have new smock gowns made
- blog, internet
- pack bags/prepare for work
- etc...

I hope I'll be able to accomplish all of these tomorrow. I tend to slack off and waste time, but unfortunately, time is not a leisure I can enjoy. Somehow, time passes so fast when I'm engrossed with work. I do enjoy earning my money, but I often wish I had more time to do things for myself, like blog and watch my DVDs and read my books, and more time to spend with my parents. Seems like I never get anything done lately. Reading Chi's blog entry about her allotting time for reading books and watching DVDs inspires me to do the same, although with my schedule, I just don't know how to do it. I actually have work scheduled until the end of May(!) already, though hopefully I might get a few days off and go to Manila(?)... Nyehehe, I'm not so sure yet.

Recently watched a bunch of Hollywood movies which I borrowed from Mam Cha, and also finished some animes. Currently I'm watching two Taiwanese dramas, THE ROSE and SUMMER x SUMMER. both are actually manga-based, and both coincidentally stars Joe Cheng. I like him and all but just can't bear to watch him play other roles besides Jiang Zhi Shu in It Started With A Kiss. Both series are actually quite OK, though I'm still on episode 8 of The Rose, and episode 3 of Summer x Summer. Well, more about these dramas next time.

I am currently quite stressed because I gave away my copy of Hakushaku to Yosei (Earl and Fairy) but realized that I don't have my own copy. Then I threw out my anime copy of Yamato Nadeshiko Shichihenge (Perfect Girl Evolution aka The Wallflower) cos I thought it was damaged, only to realize that I don't know where to get another copy and cannot find a site to download it from. I haven't watch both animes and I want these so badly for my collection and so I feel pretty distressed. Right now I cannot think straight because of these concerns. Or maybe I'm just too sleepy already.

To end this pointless entry, here's a really nice PV by supercell (recommended by Yume). It's the ending theme for Bakemonogatari, another great anime which I still have to procure.

And now I will sleep.

2010-04-12T20:51:00.009+08:00

GOODBYE, YESTERDAY

I just realized that once you have already flipped through the pages of life, you can never turn back again. A chapter that has ended will forever remain closed for good.

There are people who come into your life and find an important place in your heart. Perhaps they're meant to fulfill a purpose. But then before you even know it, they are gone and they lose their meaning. They move on without you. And you know that every second the world turns, it will not wait for you. You also need to move on without them.

Who knows if your paths will cross again? Perhaps they never will. Deep down you probably still have words left unsaid, things left undone, maybe promises you have yet to keep. But right now, none of those really matter anymore. That part of them in you has already gone, and that part of you in them has already died as well. All that's left is this vague sense of unease, this strange heaviness within, this hazy memory of the past. There is nothing else to look back to, and nothing ahead to look forward for.

I really wished your life without me was miserable. But it's not. You ARE happy. And you know what?
I am glad...

Sayonara, Yesterday.

Wasurekaketeta yuuki Torimodoshi ni yukou
Doa no mukou de matte iru Atarashii boku ni deau tame

I’ll go recover the courage that I’d started to forget
For the sake of meeting the new me who is waiting on the other side of the door.

2010-04-12T19:12:00.001+08:00

CLOSURE

I had another weird dream last night.

It started with me and my sister rushing through the airport to catch a flight to Netherlands. My sister didn't want to go with me but I insisted that she come. I was determined to do one thing and one thing only: and that is to confront my ex-boyfriend's fiancee.

We arrived in Netherlands and we immediately took a cab to the girl's house. She was surprised to see me, but she knew who I was. We talked. I don't know what we talked about but it took a while. My sister waited outside while we had our conversation.

Then the girl took us to my ex-boyfriend's place, which was a condo unit in a stylish building. I felt nervous when she rang the doorbell. When he opened the door, he was also surprised to see me. Perhaps I was the least person he wanted to see. The three of us had a heart-to-heart discussion. And then before I left, I wished the very best for them.

My sister and I took the cab back to the airport to take the last flight back home. As I looked at the buildings whizzing past, I thought Netherlands was a beautiful place. But I don't think I will ever go back there again.

With that, I took the plane home with peace in my heart.

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I don't really want to comment on this dream because I really don't know what to say. Except maybe that I never had an ex-boyfriend in real life, and that I don't know anyone who lives in Netherlands. But perhaps subconsciously, this is what I'm longing for.

2010-04-10T00:49:00.002+08:00

ENCHANTING FANTASY

I was dirt broke and yet was the diligent breadwinner for my retired father, my working mom, and my younger sister who was still in college. Life was hard but we were happy. We were together as a family after all, and that's what matters the most. We just moved into a small, run-down apartment in the middle of nowhere, and we didn't even know how to get there from work. Sometimes we would experiment on riding the public jeepneys and buses. But often times we would walk home just to scrimp on the money.

And that's when I met him again. While on the way home from work. Actually, he was the one who found me. Or maybe he has been looking for me all along.

At first glance you know he's Jerry Yan, but he was also much more than that. He was also Dao Ming Se, the super-rich, extra-handsome, ultimate-bachelor in town. He also happened to be my ex-boyfriend whom I haven't seen for a long time. I didn't want to see him again, especially not in my sorry state. But he found me. And he was determined not to lose me again.

No matter how I protested and resisted and pushed him away, he still came everyday. He goes to see me at work, and walks me home every night. He gave me presents, and even brought us our basic necessities like food. He spends time with my family, and makes them smile and laugh, something they haven't done for a while. Then he would look at me with his hopeful eyes and boyish grin, and I would turn away. I know that he loves me, and only wants to get back together with me. I also know deep down in my heart I love him but I cannot do so. His parents were against me in the first place, and I didn't want to depend on him to sustain my family. No matter how poor I was, I had too much pride, and it was the one thing people cannot take away from me.

But days went by and I was falling more and more for him. I knew that if I spent more time with him and see how happy my family was with him, I would weaken and succumb to my feelings. I am a woman after all, and one who is not without emotions. Seeing the most wonderful man on earth chase me around is not only flattering, but much more than that, I know he was sincere and truly cares for me. I know I could not bear to hurt him again by leaving him. I also know that I didn't have the courage to live without him. I love him. I already love him too much. But I had no choice but to leave him. I had to go now.

So I ran away. Ran away as far as I could. And on that cold night, while I was standing in the abandoned harbor all alone, I wept. I shed tears of pain and suffering, and cried on how life has been so unfair and bitter to me. A freezing gust of wind touched my tear-stained cheeks, and I realized with much sadness that it was actually my birthday. And I was all alone in that dark, damp harbor.

And then... Fireworks! Lots of them. Multitudes of bright lights blazed the pitch-black sky and rained down a shower of colorful sparkles. I gazed up in astonishment. And then all around me, the yachts in the harbor roared to life, their lights gleaming and glittering, flashing on me as if to spotlight me. I shielded my eyes and blinked in surprise as I saw the world's elite, one by one, coming towards me. They were led by Lee Min Ho, Kim Bum and all the other casts of Boys Over Flowers, who held cakes in their hands. Each of them greeted me a "Happy Birthday", and some of them even kissed me on the cheek. I was conscious of how dirty I was amidst all these pretty people. Yet somehow, I felt the warmth in their presence.

Then suddenly, the crowd slowly parted. And then I saw Jerry hurriedly rush towards me. His expression was one of worry, then flushed down by relief, as he took me in his arms and cradled me and said happy birthday and told me how silly I was for running away. He was all over the city looking for me, but he also sent out all his friends to find me, and when he learned where I was, he came running over. I looked at him, and saw that he was drenched with sweat, yet, he was magnificently glowing, as beautiful as a greek god.
My Jerry. My Love. I then felt all walls break loose, all pride strip off, all emotions rush in, and I acknowledged my defeat. I love him! I've always loved him! And there was no point in denying it or pushing it away. I smiled radiantly at him, the man I love, and he took me in his arms again, and softly whispered how much he loves me and treasures me.

Someone then cleared his throat and tapped Jerry in the back. We broke from our embrace, embarrassed, as we realized that hundreds of eyes were actually upon us on our fateful reunion. The guys from Boys Over Flowers were giving Jerry congratulatory pats and high-fives, and he thanked them for their help in finding me. Lee Min Ho, the leader of the search, told him that he could always count on them any time, and that he was only glad to be of service to Jerry, whom he acknowledged was the original, and only worthy Dao Ming Se there is.

The next day, I was still overwhelmed with my feelings of bliss. But I know this could not last forever. Fear slowly crept into me as Jerry told me that he was taking me to meet his family and their board of directors. Apparently, my mother is the daughter of and heiress to one of the directors, but she was disowned when she ran off with my father. Jerry told me that he has already talked to his family, and they have decided to hold an election if they will accept me into the family or not. I glanced at him nervously, and he gripped my hand gently and comfortingly, saying it was OK. I took a deep breath and with firm resolve went with him to face the people who has repeatedly tried to tear me away from the man who has always loved me.

We entered a Japanese-styled room, and the board of directors, all with grim faces, were already seated there. In the center was the head of the Doumyouji Clan, Jerry's grandfather, who regarded me with scrutiny. I turned my eyes downward and bit my lip. Then the assembly started, and after the introductions made, one by one, the members of the elite casted their votes to decide my fate. Jerry was the first to make a vote, and then of course he stood by my side. Lee Min Ho came up next, and as he was a loyal follower of Jerry, he also took our side. The next person to take the stage was Kim Joon, who stated that he has always thought Lee Min Ho was a better Doumyouji than Jerry, and he took the other side. Sam Milby came up next, and he also took the other side. One by one, each of them came up to the front and chose which side they were on. Then finally it was Jerry's grandfather's turn, and he slowly stood up, walked to the front and then I...

...woke up. ^^;

Of all the things to happen, I woke up and realized that IT WAS JUST A REALLY GOOD DREAM!!! And the next thing I realized was that my pillow was WET -- WITH DROOL!!! That's what happens when I really have a good sleep. I disgruntledly reached out for my cellphone to see the time and was splashed with another wave of realization: I WAS LATE FOR WORK!!! I hurriedly jumped off my bed to start my grueling day of work. But at some instances today, I actually found myself smiling silly over my enchanting fantasy.

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I had a lot of fun writing this story, and thank Thesaurus.com for all the glitzy words. I'm not exactly your most gifted writer, but I hope I did not make a lot of grammatical errors and didn't sound too cheesy. Tell me what you think of my writing though, as it may help me improve my style more and also in maintaining this blog.

On a side note, I've always had a bunch of weird dreams. Some of them are pretty crazy and are good for laughs, and some of them are too insignificant to actually be remembered. Some of them are great ideas, which I sometimes use for my drawings and stories, and on rare occasions, I get these really "feel good" dreams which make me feel warm and fuzzy deep down. Jerry Yan is one of my all-time favorite celebrity crushes, as his portrayal of Dao Ming Se in 2001's Meteor Garden sent my bishie-fandom sky-rocketing to cloud nine. Although I'm not as hyped over him as before, I've always still liked him. I didn't expect him to show up as (ultra-mega-super-good looking!!!) lead character in my dream though, since it's been a while since I've seen him perform. I also didn't expect the cast of Boys Over Flowers to be there, since I haven't seen that korean drama yet. I was definitely shocked to see Sam Milby in my dream, because I NEVER liked him! So that was really weird. =o=

I don't know why I had that dream, but it made me feel really really good. Now I'm listening to Jerry's second album, FREEDOM, and loving him ("my ex-boyfriend" *winks*) all over again...

我會很愛妳 , Jerry.

2010-04-05T04:31:00.006+08:00

NEW LOOK. SAME OLD ME.
ephemerality: a piffle princess story version 8.0

I finally decided to take the time to change my blog lay-out. I've been meaning to do this for quite some time but has always been procrastinating. I can't understand HTML at all so changing the lay-out has always been a painful task which pretty much involved a lot of guesswork. But this time I merely conformed to blogger's custom templates, took a nice pic and edited in text using MS Paint (I still don't know how to use Photoshop, fufufufu...T__T), and with a little bit of tweaking ended up with this.

TA-DAH!!! >___Kuronuma Sawako and Kazehaya "Love of My Life" Shota from the recently ended anime, Kimi ni Todoke (Reaching You). It's been a while since I've been fixated over an anime series, and KimiTodo simply knocked me silly and giddy with all the Kuronuma x Kazehaya Love *hearts* so I just simply had to feature them! I got this image from the first volume of the manga.

As for the title... I was searching for a word that would connote something that's only impermanent and fleeting, since I don't really intend to stick with this lay-out for so long (well, it really depends on my procrastination powers, so I don't want to raise your hopes up yet...). Found the word "EPHEMERAL" in Thesaurus.com and supposed that I liked the sound of it. I initially planned to combine it with other words and ended up with titles like, "Ephemeral Phase" and "Road to Ephemerality" but none of them sounded quite right. Eventually I decided to keep it short and simple, and so I just went with the word, Ephemerality.

This is apparently the 8th lay-out since the birth of this blog in 2003, but I honestly don't quite remember anymore. During the long hiatus, I actually did consider closing down this blog and maybe start anew somewhere else, or perhaps just simply stop blogging altogether. But every time I think about leaving this, it pains me. I may not have the best blog and may not make the most frequent updates, but I have somehow painstakingly maintained this site for SEVEN years, and I think that really speaks a lot. This blog and I... we've been through a lot, especially during the first few years when I was still spending long hours in internet cafes to maintain this site. I recorded a lot of my memories here, rambled about anything-under-the-sun, and most importantly, met a lot of new friends through my blog. I primarily created this blog as an outlet to channel and as a buffer to support my overflowing thoughts and emotions, but now, deep down in my heart, I somehow quite believe that there are also people who actually care enough to read this, and who enjoy what I write, and maybe were, in some way or another, touched by my thoughts. This gives me great pleasure and I am overwhelmed and simply filled with appreciation and gratitude for all these years of support. Thank you very much.

And as I close this entry, I just want to say that IT WAS NOT MY INTENTION TO MAKE THIS ACADEMY AWARD-LIKE SPEECH, LOLz! But what the heck, I have successfully ended up making my comeback entry extra-cheesy and emo, and I'm too lazy and sleepy to fix all that so we'll just leave it that way.

Bye for now!!! (^o^)/

2009-10-03T23:06:00.002+08:00
SOME RANDOM PIFFLE BLOG ENTRY

So, Mam Cha and I went out today after work. We brisk-walked around the capitol grounds for around 30 minutes then went to Café Royale to eat. XD She ordered a Royale Burger, and I had Fetuccini Carbonara. The place is OK, and the food is so-so. I might eat there again in the future.

So after dinner and after Mam Cha bought dog food for her pet Bluto, we went to Mercury Drugstore to buy some groceries. I bought some food stuffs and the usual box of coffee, while Mam Cha bought shampoo and stuffs. We parted ways after that. I walked for a while, burning with the desire to buy potato chips and pistachio nuts and ice cream and Jollibee etc etc etc, but I figured that I really don’t need those junk in my body. I bought bread instead (for breakfast tomorrow). I felt a bit better that I didn’t indulge in my temptations.

BUT! I did drop by the DVD stalls near the plaza! *kitsune-ears!* I haven’t bought DVDs lately because I’ve been trying to scrimp money, at the same time avoiding the urge to hoard unnecessarily. *coughs* Well, when I visited this one stall, they were selling several interesting anime titles which I still don’t have: Love Get Chu, Tiny Snow Sugar Fairy, Mushi-Uta, Phantom Requiem, Needless, Canaan, Munto, Maria Holic, Moetan, plus so many other titles I can’t possibly remember! I was about to get Phantom Requiem and Mushi-Uta, but when I tried the discs, Phantom Requiem only had 6 episodes (not sure if this is complete), and Mushi-Uta erroneously contained Kaze no Stigma episodes (and I’ve already seen this. It’s kewl, btw! ^o^) Embarrassed to leave the place without having bought anything, I decided to get a copy of Natsu no Arashi. I had planned to download this before, but maybe I’ll try to watch the pirated version first before deciding if it’s worth the effort and time to download. It looks promising though.

Then I went back to the hospital. I’m supposed to clean my room then get some badly needed sleep through the night, but I got distracted and I’m now copying animes, watching a bit of this and that, while trying to finish writing this random blog entry. I watched Lovely Complex Live Action (Teppei LoVe!<3<3<3), a bit of Lucky Star, and some parts of Suzumiya Haruhi no Gekisou. Aya Hirano - MOE! ^___^ I haven’t exactly finished watching Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu though and I heard there’s already another new season. Can’t.Catch.Up.Must.Catch.Up.!

I’m currently watching Princess Princess... I’m still not done with it. Hopefully I’ll finish it this week. Then I might start watching Suoh’s animes so that I can return all of them to him when I get to Manila...
Ai Yori Aoshi Enishi
Bakuretsu Tenshi
Genshiken 2
Goshuushou-sama Ninomiya-kun
Kamichu!
Lucky Star
Minami-ke
Myself, Yourself
Noir
Rahxephon
Sayonara, Zetsubou-sensei
SuzukaI actually borrowed these maybe 2 years ago? Hehehe I don’t think I can finish watching all of these though in just a few days’ time, so maybe I’ll just save them temporarily in the PC. I have no more disk space (again!) so I need to start burning them into DVDs.

Perhaps I need an external hard disk? Maybe, one terabyte? T_____T

ABSOLUTE TEPPEI YUMMY-NESS!!!<3<3<3

2009-10-01T01:37:00.004+08:00
HOW MY DAY WENT FROM RIGHT TO WRONG, THEN FROM WRONG TO RIGHT

Today’s trip home was a deviation from the norm.

I was supposed to leave the hospital early because I planned to drop by a lawyer’s office to get a Special Power of Attorney, and then drop by the Budget Office in Mambajao to get my paycheck before I take the 4pm fast craft home. Sounds like a smooth and easy plan right? Yet everything just went totally wrong!!! 0___o

First the driver was a bit late. Then we waited for the midwife who knew the way to the lawyer’s house, but she didn’t arrive on time so I told the driver we’ll just pick her up from their house. It turned out that she wasn’t prepared yet! When we got to her place at almost 3pm, she was still taking a bath! Since I was in a hurry, I told her that we can do this some other time, but she insisted that we do it already and eventually got into the vehicle with us. The lawyer’s house was a bit far but it was along the way to Mambajao anyway so we still went. However, we learned that the lawyer wasn’t home so we hurriedly proceeded to the Budget Office. It took me only around 10 minutes to get my check, then we were breezing through the highway headed straight towards the Benoni pier. The long drive from Catarman to Mambajao took more time than usual though and so when we got to the port, I was just in time to see the Paras Seacat riding the waves gracefully.

And there goes my ride home. T____T

Because I was still with the driver and the midwife, I tried to appear unaffected and just cheerfully told them that I’ll be fine taking the barge home. I went to buy a ticket, and learned that it’s already for the last trip, which leaves at 6pm! I frowned, remembering the last time I took the last barge trip home. I had to wait for two hours in Balingoan for the bus that time and arrived at CDO past 11pm already! I was so not looking forward to going home so late, especially since I was wrestling with my two heavy luggages. But I didn’t have any choice.

Sitting forlornly in the ferry, seeing that I still got almost 2 hours of waiting time, I fished out the hard copy of Breaking Dawn from my bag and finished the last 100 pages of Bella-nonsense that I’ve been putting off. By the time I closed the book, dusk was already settling in. Twilight, I thought to myself. How fitting. (*rolls eyes*)
I tried to kill time by texting, while crossing my fingers and wishing that by some miracle, I’d get home by 10pm. Fat chance of that happening!

And then... I saw him. And he saw me. Our eyes met, And everything changed. (LMAO!)

It was one of the med reps who covers for Camiguin. The one whom I hadn’t seen for the past week. I think I didn’t even see him last month. (Oh, and that would simply mean I forgot all about his products already XD). He waved and hurried to sit next to me. We chitchatted for a while, and he offered me a ride home in his car to which I immediately agreed to. I absolutely had no desire to wait for two more hours for the bus ride home.

He moved to another seat closer to the TV. When the ticket inspectors came, he waved at me asking if I paid already. I waved my ticket back to him, indicating that I’ve already got one. The ticket officer then approached me, took my ticket, and gave me back my money. She told me that the med rep already paid for both of us. I thought it’s probably best to decline, but then decided otherwise and just pocketed back my money. That’s Php135 saved. Yay-ness!

When we got to the port of Balingoan, he offered to carry my bag because I guess it was the chivalrous thing to do. Then we went to get his car, and off we went whizzing down the highway. I had a very good feeling I was going to get home safer and earlier than expected, and that I won’t appear as haggard-looking as I imagined myself to be. Around halfway down to CDO, he stopped in a resto and ordered dinner for us. I was hoping we’d just go home already, but I guess he must’ve been so hungry by then. Anyway, it was charged to their company so I didn’t really feel guilty about digging in the Bulalo, Inihaw and Kinilaw.

The rest of the ride home took less than an hour, and I didn’t bother pretending to feel embarrassed or anything when he offered to drop me off in front of our gate. I was very glad to have a convenient (and free) ride home and was thankful that he was opportunely there. GOD must really love me so much to provide me this good fortune. THANK YOU LORD!

It was exactly 945pm when I got home. My good friend Lalac then texted me saying that she was on her way to my house. We had made plans earlier to meet and I thought we would just have to cancel the appointment because my trip home was delayed. But since I got home relatively "earlier" (hey, I expected to get home past 11!) so we pushed through with our plans to see each other. I haven’t seen Lalac for quite some time, and it was also her first time to visit our new apartment. It was also her first time to bring along and let me meet her BOYFRIEND. I just took a peek cos I thought it would be rude to stare. LOLz

Lalac took my two guitars home with her. Since I hardly play the guitar anymore (heck, I’m not even good with it! XD), I have decided to sell one of them to her. Lalac is great with musical instruments and I’m sure she’ll take good care of my acoustic guitar. My other guitar (which is a classical type) was damaged, and she volunteered to fix it for me. I’m sad that it was broken and I hope she’ll get it fixed. I also sold her one of my Sony Ericsson cellphones, but I’m not sure if she’ll buy it. She said she’ll check it out tonight and decide tomorrow if she’ll purchase it.

Yes, I know. I’m now so POOR I’m already starting to sell my things! LOLz!

To end this crazy day, I’m now copying Shikakage’s anime files into my computer so that I can return her DVDs ~~tomorrow~~ later. I got the following titles from her:
Azumanga Daioh
Code Geass
Code Geass R2
Gundam Seed Character Theater
Haibane Renmei
Kimikiss Pure Rouge
Magikano
Major Seasons 1-4
SCRYEDI haven’t watched these yet, and will probably not watch these anytime soon. I am just in a hoard mode right now. Hehehe Getting some much needed zzz’s after this!

gOoDnIgHt!!! ^________^

2009-09-29T17:52:00.002+08:00
SPARE ME THE CROCODILE TEARS!

... is what I would’ve wanted to tell the nurse who borrowed money from me. I was already mentally preparing my "little speech" on responsibility and shamelessness since it’s already been 4 days past the date she promised to pay up. But this morning, she told me she was going to withdraw from the bank, and when she came back this afternoon, she secretly handed me my cash.

I tried to appear nonchalant about it, but when I got back to my room, I immediately counted if I got the right amount. It was PhP2000 alright, plus something else. She added an extra 100 bucks! What am I supposed to do with THIS!?! I am no sleazeball five-six loanshark trying to bamboozle off my hospital staff! I immediately went out of my room to return her money but learned that she had already gone home. I’ll just return the money tomorrow.

HONESTLY! Am I supposed to feel better about this!? Is this some sort of reverse psychology!?! Now I seem like some petty corrupt crook! I do feel relieved though that she paid up, and hope against all hopes that she won’t do it again. When she handed me the money, I somehow got the impression that she wanted to wink and say, "SA UULITIN!"

That would really be so darn creepy!!!

2009-09-29T13:27:00.005+08:00
~~FOOT~~ FRUIT IN MY MOUTH

Besides the tourist spots and recreation areas, Camiguin Island is widely known for its deliciously sweet lanzones. And during these months, the lanzones trees here are in full bloom.

Yet for me, I eat the fruit but I’ve never been that obsessive with lanzones. I think it tastes OK but is just too complicated to eat. I don’t like getting my hands wet with fruit sap, and also don’t like getting leftover peelings and seeds, hence classifying it as one of my not-so-favorite fruits. Sometimes patients give me lanzones, and I do accept their sincerity and generosity (since I never turn down gifts from patients), but I am quick to share the fruits with the hospital staff. Last month I brought home a whole box (around 20 kilos!) of lanzones for my family and friends. I didn’t eat a single fruit from the box, but everyone was so happy indulging themselves to their hearts' content. It would’ve been easy to place an order for another box this time, but I find it such a hassle to travel the seas with such a huge box with me (add to that my bulky luggage of clothes and my big bag of whatnots).

Anyway, this morning in the OPD clinic, we didn’t have that many patients. One of our OPD staffs, Mam Mimi, offered me a handful of lanzones from their place in Bura, and I immediately struggled to think of a means to give it away without hurting her feelings. Yesterday, a patient also gave me a clusterful, which I gave to my ER nurse. This time, I wasn’t planning to eat it again. But since I didn’t have much to do anyway, so I decided to try eating it just so she can see that I appreciated her gift. However, the first bite was unbelievably soOOooOoOooOoOoooo sweet that I couldn’t help but eat ALL of the lanzones by myself! I crushed and peeled and ate, crushed and peeled and ate, crushed and peeled and ate, until there were no more left. I think it was around half a kilo. Maybe more. Hehehe. I was so stuffed that I could hardly eat my lunch anymore (not that it was anything special XD). I feel ridiculous right now because everyone here somehow knows that I’m not really into lanzones, yet I ate so much. It’s like putting my foot in my mouth (only it was something much sweeter and tasteful XD).

Well, I feel happy and full now and I guess that’s what’s important. ^_____^

2009-09-28T21:17:00.001+08:00
A FLOOD OF REALITY

I turned on the TV, and immediately wished I hadn’t.

I’ve been out of touch from the world for the weekend, preferring to watch DVD movies instead of TV programs. Although I have heard of some stories and reports of how Typhoon Ondoy has wrecked damage to our country during its passage, but nothing could exactly prepare me for the visuals.

Too shocked to move and too numb to even reach for the remote control, I sat down helplessly in front of the TV, and watched the news.

It’s beyond words.

Seeing hungry families stranded in their roofs, cars and houses damaged and overturned, and the vivid image of people riding atop a sheet of metal literally surfing the waves of flood, I am at a loss of what to say. I saw the bridge of Marikina and remembered the time I once passed by there while admiring their lifelike carabao effigies -- now the entire place is all muddy and indistinguishable. Even so much more distressing were the large number of corpses they have recovered, most of them dug up from the deep murky waters and mud, while others were just haplessly strewn on trees and other structures. It’s like watching a movie gone disastrously wrong.

Our city was not struck that much by Typhoon Ondoy, but I still feel a bit uneasy. I’ve always thought that our city was impenetrable to natural calamities because of its geography, but it was only a few months ago when our rivers overflooded and wiped out houses and lives. And it would have been OK if I know my family is in a secure place, but we’ve just recently moved into our apartment, which does not exactly look like sturdiest place to live in. And right now, I’m in an island and so far away from home. I know my family's OK, but I still can’t help but feel a bit worried. I just have to entrust their safety in God’s loving hands.

And for the rest of the victims of Typhoon Ondoy, all I can do is PRAY, and hope that amidst this tragedy, they can find the courage and strength to rise up and move on.

2009-09-26T10:23:00.004+08:00
TILL DEBT DO US PART

One of the things I’m really good at remembering are DEBTS. Somehow, I just cannot fail to forget who borrowed money from me, and how much money I’ve borrowed from someone else. I guess it’s because when you owe money it involves concepts like RESPONSIBILITY and OBLIGATION. It is like making a PROMISE, and keeping it, and I am not one to turn my back on my word. And I also expect others to do their part.

But more often than not, debtors tend to sway away from you when the time has come for collecting their dues. They make excuses, attempts to postpone the date, or somehow just disappear from the face of the earth. Some even have the nerve to conveniently forget about it. And ironically, with our Filipino upbringing, it feels embarrassing to chase after these people. It takes a lot of courage to bring up stuffs like this, especially when the due date has been pushed off so many times already. It’s also such an effort to run after these people. The tables have turned and instead of getting fulfillment from helping someone in need, you end up frustrated and remorseful for having been duped.

In my workplace, there is a person who has a reputation for frequently borrowing money and not paying it. She’s also known to be irresponsible with funds and cannot liquidate expenses properly. But because she is a person of authority, she sometimes gets away with it. I have been warned by my co-employees several times not to fall into her evil scheming hands. But I didn’t expect it to happen to me.

Last Thursday, she came to me and asked if she could borrow PhP2000 from me because she needed to pay someone. She said the bank was offline that day so she can’t withdraw, but she will pay me the next day since it was salary day anyway. I twitched nervously, and with a poker face told her to just pay the person on Friday since she was getting her salary anyway, but she said the person needs the money immediately. She even added that it was embarrassing for her to approach me and it was her first time to do something like this. I almost rolled my eyes when she said that. I wanted to worm my way out of the situation but I can’t. She knew I had money at hand because I just received my salary, and she knew I still have my money because I don’t have the time to go to a bank. She looked at me self-assuredly and promises to return the money the next day. I had no way to go but to concede.

She was not here the next day cos she had to go to a seminar. She’s not here for the weekend because she doesn’t have work.

AAAAaaaAaaAAAAaRRRRrRrrRrrRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

So right now I’m sitting here feeling stupid, but I really can’t blame myself because I was trapped by her that time. I just hope and pray that come Monday, she will pay me at her own will and that I don’t have to run after her. But if ever she won’t pay up, I will definitely demand for my money. I am not going to feel embarrassed because that’s MY money and MY right. I will NOT be a victim.