[sings along to cafe music] I actually like this song by Aaron Carter called, "Im All About You"... wehehehe ^^;;
SO! How have I been!?! ^o^ I just wanna say that the third year in Medicine is so so so.... GAAAaahhhhh!! [pulls hair in frustration] YEzzz... FrUsTrAtInG de-su! We have so many subjects in a day, and many of the profs don't show up! Like in our daily subject Surgery, we only had one class this week! That's prolly good news at first, but then they start scheduling MAKE-UP CLASSES! x__X I heard that later on this year, we might have so many make-up classes that we'll prolly have to schedule them even on sundays! Gah! Hidoi de-su! >.<
And the profs - perhaps cos these are part-time profs and full-time clinicians - we don't seem to bond well. I don't know. Maybe it's still too early too judge. But sometimes they just rush into the room, lecture for an hour, and then rush out - and we hardly get to catch their names! [@__@] And guess what!? They love to give surprise quizzes! Waahhh!! [pulls hair in frustration again] I got 2/6 in the first OB surprise quiz. Ehek. That's what I deserve for doodling during class. ^^;;;
Lessons! Ah... all the lectures are all jumbled-up in my brain! Like in radiology, I can't seem to understand the luscencies and densities in the X-Ray films. I feel so stupid.. ^^;; So I need to read more. But how the heck can I read and study for 11 subjects!? And I feel so tired when I get home, so I tend to doze off. Last night I fell asleep on a chair again. Ah! Misakichan - The Queen of Slumber. ^____^
Anyway, I should not complain, because I chose this life. Instead, I should try harder, right? Besides, if others were able to do it, then so can I! Right? (^o^)v
One of the subjects we have now is Junior Clerkship, which is basically a preparation for our Senior Clerkship duties in the hospital next year. But for now, as junior clerks, we'll just be rotating in four departments - Medicine, Pedia, OB and Surgery - and just do history and PE on one patient per week and submit our data with our diagnosis, differential diagnoses and management plans. It's a very very VERY tedious and meticulous procedure, and my mind is all mixed up now cos I still haven't started on my report yet. In the first place, I don't know where the heck I should start because our patient has so many health problems!! And we're expected to submit and be grilled about it this Monday already. u__u
Anyway, this was what happened last Thursday on our first day as junior clerks...
So we went early to NMMC (which people here call provincial hospital) and headed for the Pedia ICU ward. Our group will be dealing with Pediatric patients for the next two months. Anyway, the patient assigned to us was a 9-month old female infant with a CNS infection. It felt very sad because she seemed so small, yet all these tubes were hooked to her and she was all rigid and couldn't move a muscle. [sad] She has stayed in the hospital for more than a month already, had three convulsive episodes, her skull is filled with CS fluid and yet she couldn't be operated upon because they don't have any money! That is one of the sad and cruel realities in this world, especially in this country. Majority of the people don't have access to the right medical services because we are struck with poverty.
Anyway, we were able to witness something else that time. In the bed adjacent to our patient's bed, a 1-month old infant suddenly seemed to be in great distress, and then two of the senior clerks, supervised by the pediatrician, hurried to give the kid CPR. I think they did that for about 15 minutes, and just looking at the procedure being done brings us so much pain. The infant looked so small and weak and vulnerable, as if his rib cage might break with every push of the senior clerk's hands. We turned away for a while to speak to our patient's mother and when we turned again to look, we saw the senior clerk cleaning the infant's butt area. I thought that the kid was saved, but then we noticed that he was no longer connected to the oxygen tank. And then, the senior clerk wrapped him with a blanket and called the morgue to take the infant away. We were so shocked to realize that the kid was already dead. I don't know, but that time I know there was sadness deep within me, yet all I felt was indifference. I guess I realized that we really couldn't do anything. That's a sad reality, because I thought we exist to save lives. But I guess sometimes we can actually be so helpless. u.u
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